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S1 E1

Hotel Hell · Season 1, Episode 1

“Juniper Hill Inn, Part One” quotes from Hotel Hell

3 quotes

“Juniper Hill Inn, Part One” · Season 1, Episode 1

In this episode: Robert (3), Gordon (2)

(Interview) The guests that we don't want here, are people who don't have a lot of money.

When we typically take a reservation, we will tell people it's a three course meal.

But that's... for the residents, I'm talking about a local coming in here.

We're reservation only though, so nobody walks in, we don't have a walk-in.

What? How can you expect to appeal to the locals?

Um... we haven't identified the appropriate people to come here or...

Hold on a minute. What do you mean, "appropriate people"?

People who can afford 59$ for three courses.

GGordon (narration)

"Appropriate people"? What a snob! Where does he think he is; The Ritz?

Are you always this pathetic?

I am not pathetic.

Well when are you going to stand up and start showing some respect for your team, and start growing a pair, to sort of understand the mess you're in?

I understand the mess we're in.

Right.

I'm fighting for the team.

You dug the fucking hole...

Yes.

...and put them in it! So they're fucked!

They don't have to work here.

Oh, my God!

I mean, you know, the bottom line is...

How dare you?

No, they don't have to work here!

How DARE you? How FUCKING DARE you! "They don't have to work here." Oh, my God!

I, I - I - care -

You disrespectful, disgusting man! "They don't have to work here." I don't think you realize how fucking lucky you are. Because if it wasn't for 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 of them, you'd be driving that RV miles away from here!

RRyan

(interview) Robert definitely needs a reality check. It's life or death right now, and I don't think he actually realizes what kind of jeopardy this place is in.

It's not all about you, Robert. Robert's world, Robert's bubble, Robert's dream. You're not the lord of the manor, and you're not The Great Gatsby. You're - you're, you're - you're Robert. There's only me in here.

Excuse me, excuse me.

Go on then, you pompous fuck!

EXCUSE me! Don't talk to me like that.

What - what's wrong with it? I want to know what's wrong with -

Don't speak to me like that!

Well I'm telling you! Get your head out of your arse and start getting a little fucking real! You STILL haven't got it, that this place is sinking! Start paying a little more attention to the guys on the ground, understand how hard it is out there, forget your fucking... Antique Roadshow... and START from the bottom running this business! You're right: there's no structure! It's fragmented! The team needs a leader, they need a structure. They need a mentor, they need some... support! And all they get is nitpicked. What kind of motivation is that? All I've heard since I've been here is you're just blaming people. And I'm blaming you for not taking charge. GET FUCKING REAL. (walks out) Fucking hell...

["To Be Continued..." appears on the screen]

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