La Tasha, Gordon and others in “Episode One”

What I have here is a grilled hickory-rubbed watermelon.

Seriously? You had forty-five minutes to make me anything, and you grill me a slice of fucking melon?

Yes, chef.

The rub doesn't work. I'm disappointed, it's underwhelming! One! (to Fernando) Okay, young man, could you take your glasses off for one minute? How old are you?

Twenty-eight.

Stop! Harry Potter looks older! [audience laughs] Jesus, are you on a diet?

It's enough.

It's enough?!

It's enough.

[laughs along with the audience and contestants] For you or me?

Oh, shit!

Okay, so what's the dish?

Pan-seared pigeon, chef, with a sweet potato purée and a California fig and balsamic reduction.

You cooked the squab beautifully. Purée's just absolutely sublime. Congratulations, four.

Thank you, chef.