Addison quotes from Grey's Anatomy

Mark

Aren't you gonna get in there? If you wanna be chief, you gotta fight with the big boys.

Addison

Oh, I intend to fight like a girl. I'll let them kill each other and then I'll be the only one left standing.

Derek

What's different?

Webber

Nothing.

Addison

Leave him be.

Derek

What happened to your hair?

Webber

Nothing.

Derek

Mm-hmm.

Derek

[whispers to Addison] See. Look. Watch.

Burke

What happened to your hair?

Addison

Ahem. Leave him be.

Mark

He dyed it.

Derek

But why? [Addison smacks him with a magazine] Ow!

Addison

[hisses at Derek] Leave him be.

Derek

[whispers] What are you doing?!

Addison

What?

Burke

[looks back at Richard] OK, but why?

Richard

Men who have gray hair are noticed less than men who don't.

Derek

By who?

Richard

Well...

Burke

By the ladies?

Derek

It looks good, chief.

Burke

Very natural.

Mark

Ladies will love it.

Addison

[to the guys] He is alone. All alone. Do any of you even know what that's like? [looks at Burke] Lives with Cristina. [looks at Derek] Dates the perfect twelve-year-old. [looks at Mark] Man whore! His wife left him after 25 years of marriage. So if the man wants to dye his hair for the ladies, let him dye his hair for the ladies. Leave him be.

Izzie

I mean, how do you know that it didn't feel so right, because it's God's plan?

Addison

God wants you to be an adulterer?

Izzie

God got a virgin pregnant by magic. God is not playing by the rules.

Addison, I did everything exactly the way I was supposed to. After college, I never dated anyone except Sam, because he was the one. I never had sex with Sam, because cheating is wrong. I had a baby, because that's what you do when you get married. I never made a single mistake, I did everything right. And then Sam comes home and says he wants a divorce. So all those photos you're busy admiring, all they are are reminders of stuff I didn't do. I'm 38 years old, and I don't know how to have fun. That's not lucky, that's sad! So, just shut up about lucky!

Addison

Poor, sad, dried up Naomi.

Shut up.

Addison

Poor, little, special, talented, doctor girl. That may be good for a TV movie, but... poor, little, special, dried up girl, who has no fun.

I can put you out. You'd have to sleep in the car. You're just... [sighs] I just wish I'd been a little bit more like you.

Addison

What, an adulteress bitch who forgot to have kids?

Addison

This is what you invited me to? This is your big bachelor party?

Derek

It was last minute, I needed some more bodies.

Mark

Which would explain why I'm here.

Addison

Why am I the only girl, by the way? What am I, the entertainment? I am not stripping.

Derek

[referring to himself and Mark] That's okay, we've seen it already.

Mark

True.

Burke

I haven't.

Burke

Cristina; I could promise to hold you, and to cherish you. I could promise to be there in sickness and in health. I could say 'til death do us part', but I won't. Those vows are for optimistic couples, the ones full of hope. And I do not stand here on my wedding day optimistic or full of hope.

Addison

Okay, um...

Burke

I am not optimistic, I am not hopeful. I am sure. I am steady. And I know I am a heart man, take them apart, put them back together. I hold them in my hands. I am a heart man. So this, I am sure. You are my partner, my lover, my very best friend. My heart, my heart, beats for you. And on this day, the day of our wedding, I promise you this. I promise you to lay my heart in the palm of your hands. I promise you, me.

Burke

Too trite? Because I can rewrite it.

Izzie

No, no it's...

Addison

I think I speak for every woman in this room when I say... dump her. Dump Yang and marry me. [They all laugh.]

Meredith

Hey, you're leaving already?

Addison

I have a plane to catch. I walk on the beach now, I buy aromatherapy candles, I'm very zen, but I want to kick your ass so badly right now it is killing me.

Meredith

Excuse me?

Addison

I'm talking about Derek. Derek Christopher Shepherd. Are you letting him get away? Because I swear to God Meredith, if you let him ride off into the sunset with that doe-eyed little thing... [walks away]

Bailey

What's she doing?

Webber

It looks like she's praying.

Mm, no. Addie doesn't pray.

Callie

What's she doing?

Uh, she's praying.

Callie

[chuckles] No, Addison doesn't pray. She must be hiding.

Addison

I can hear you! And I'm not hiding. I am trying to pray but I don't know how to pray because I'm a WASP and we only go to church on Christmas.

Callie

You guys go, I got this. [sits next to Addison]

Addison

I have no clout with God. God doesn't even know who I am. Which sucks because I could... I could use some help.

Callie

Dear God, I need your guidance. I kissed a peds surgeon.

Addison

You kissed a peds surgeon?

Callie

I never thought I'd end up with a woman, God, but, I mean not until lately, but that's not the problem. The problem is the peds thing. She's, she's perky... and has butterflies on her scrub cap. But she's also hot... really hot. So, help me get over the butterflies. Amen. [to Addison] You're an amazing doctor, you save babies. God knows who you are.

Addison

Do you really believe in all this? In God?

Callie

Sometimes. Most of the time. When it counts.