[voiceover] Grief may be a thing we all have in common, but it looks different on everyone.
MarkIt isn't just death we have to grieve. It's life. It's loss. It's change.
And when we wonder why it has to suck so much sometimes, has to hurt so bad. The thing we gotta try to remember is that it can turn on a dime.
That's how you stay alive. When it hurts so much you can't breathe, that's how you survive.
By remembering that one day, somehow, impossibly, you won't feel this way. It won't hurt this much.
Grief comes in its own time for everyone, in its own way.
So the best we can do, the best anyone can do, is try for honesty.
The really crappy thing, the very worst part of grief is that you can't control it.
The best we can do is try to let ourselves feel it when it comes.
And let it go when we can.
The very worst part is that the minute you think you're past it, it starts all over again.
And always, every time, it takes your breath away.
There are five stages of grief. They look different on all of us, but there are always five.
Oh, Adele. Oh I'm so sorry, I sent the Chief into surgery. Do you want me to-
What I want is for you to tell me the truth. Are you having an affair with my husband?
I am not having an affair with your husband!
I saw the way you handled him just now.
Handled! I did not... handle... there was no handling... we work together.
You spend every waking moment together, you finish each other's sentences, you read each other's minds. You're more married to that man than I am.
Yeah, but that's just because they're husband and work-wife.
The Chief's your work-husband and you're his work-wife. You look out for each other, you take care of each other, there's nothing wrong with it, it's like me and Sloan.
Mark
Excuse me?
Nobody's talking to you. He's my work-husband but he has a girlfriend, I have a girlfriend, but nothing going on between us.
Mark
I mean, there was at one point...
Neither one of you are helping. Adele, I promise you there's nothing going on.
Something is going on because he hasn't been in his bed all week.
Mark
Really?
The last time he acted like this, disappearing, sleeping at the hospital every night, he was with Ellis Grey. He may not be having an affair with you-
He's not, I promise you. I promise you, he's not.
Okay. But wife-wife to work-wife, someone in this hospital is sleeping with our husband.
Mark
It must suck to work on Valentine's Day. I don't believe we've met... [Lexie turns around and looks at him] Ahhh! What'd you do to your hair?
I changed it. I.. I colored it. I just... [sighs] Wait, you thought I was someone else. You didn't know it was me, and you were hitting on me?
Mark
No, no... I pretty much thought that you were some blonde.
You are pathetic. And hypocritical. And slutty.
Mark
And you are no blonde. You can't pull that off. Blondes are either bad-ass or fun. And you're... you're a brunette.
Mark
You missed it. Altman tore Hunt a new one in the cafeteria. Whole hospital's talking about it.
Not to me. I walk in a room, and all the conversation grinds to a halt.
Mark
Oh come on, you don't talk locker room talk in front of the coach.
I'm not a coach anymore, I'm a player. I take a shower like everybody else.
Mark
Richard. You're a little bit like everybody else, but mostly, you're still the coach. It's a sign of respect. You'd be wrong to take it any other way.
Mark
Lex, I'm still in love with you. I tried not to be, but it didn't work. And Sloane's gone. There's no baby. And I don't wanna sleep around. I want another chance. I'm in love with you.
Karev....he's....Mark, I-I have a boyfriend.
Mark
I know. I'm saying you could have a husband.
[Teddy joins Mark, Callie, Miranda and Derek for a drink after her date]
Okay, so get this...his very first question: "So what's your favorite food?"
Mark
What'd you say?
French, but that's not the point. Why would he ask me what my favorite food was? Like he read that that's some good icebreaker from some internet handbook that was handed out at the loser fair? Ugh!
This is why you don't meet people on the internet.
You're married! You don't get to have an opinion about my pathetic forays into internet dating.
Mark
Listen, I don't know what's going on here but I know better than to mess with you on turf so do me a solid, nod and act as if we're havin' a big debate here 'cause Dr. Grey over there, she agreed to go out with me if I talked to you.
Mark
I know, I dig it.
EEli
What's in it for me?
Mark
Seahawks. Sunday, box seats.
Mark
Of course.
EEli
Okay. [shouts] Unless Dr. Bailey herself orders that drain put back in I...
Mark
Now mention how highly I think of her.
EEli
... I don't care if you think Dr. Grey is the best resident you've ever seen come through this program.
Mark
I understand, and I respect that. Thank you. [walks back to Lexie] Ah, I did what I could. What time do you get off?
What?! That's it? You didn't do anything!
Mark
See you at nine. [walks off]
You're going out with Sloan tonight?
One drink. And then you are gonna interrupt us and tell me that there#s a medical emergency.
There might be a medical emergency if you don't get that drain put back in your guy. I'm just sayin'. I guess you can observe when I'm taking out that gallbladder through dude's mouth.
Mark
What did Arizona say?
Mark
Well, that's good, right?
Eh, I'm still hedging my bets. I'm not gonna move back in with her until I know for sure she's not gonnna bail again.
[walks up] Hey, you got dinner plans tonight?
Mark
No.
I'm cooking for you tonight, your place. I rocked the lab coli. [kisses him and walks off]
So when you gonna tell her?
Mark
Not until after my home cooked meal.
Mark, you do not have to do this. I'm giving you a get out of jail free card, no hard feelings, you can be the cool uncle that hangs out on Sundays.
Mark
I'm not the cool uncle. I'm the dad.
You love Lexie. And the last time a Sloan kid appeared in Seattle she dumped you. Now, if you were the cool uncle...
Mark
I'm not the cool uncle! Don't ever say that again. This is my kid. I want this kid. [mutters] Cool uncle.
Well, so then tell her. Do not wait until this kid comes out looking all Sloan-y.
I'm putting in tarragon, not that I have any idea what tarragon tastes like but I think when people use tarragon it makes them seem like they know what they're doing. Basil can't do that. Anybody can sling some basil around the kitchen.
Mark
Callie's pregnant.
Oh my God, that's great. She loves babies. Did- Did they do a turkey baster thing or- or something? I mean, wait a minute, okay, so wait. Arizona just got back... and they, were they doing this, wait was this before... [looks at Mark who's looking down, then he looks at her, she realizes]
Mark
I saw the heart beat today. This is my kid, this is a part of me. ... Please, is there any way we can...
[teary eyed] How the hell did you get me in this position... [slams counter] twice?! It... It is... Unbelievable. You are unbelievable!
[to Arizona and Mark] Here's the thing. I get that things are going to be different now, and uh, that's why I'm gonna eat that chicken...even though the only thing I want right now is a peanut butter sandwich.
Oh, I'm not done. If we're gonna do this whole everybody gets a vote thing, there's gonna be a new system. We'll still each get one vote, but also, the baby gets a vote. As I house the baby, I'll be speaking for him/her. And, since I'll be pushing this baby out of a very small hole in my body, I'll also get an extra special vagina vote! So, that's uh, three votes for us, two votes for you guys. Oh! We get the final say! Now, I'll be using my many votes to say that once a day, I will have one cup of regular coffee which is perfectly fine according to the studies that I've read. At least until I begin breastfeeding. Now, anybody wanna argue with my extra special vagina vote?
Mark
No thank you.
[spoken in unison with Mark] No...
Great. [silence] Oh. We also vote that Mark gives me a foot rub.
[about her baby] She's not ready, no she can't leave. She's been watched by doctors twenty four hours a day...
Mark
She still willl.
Okay, well, her lungs. She could get RSV.
Well, any kid could get...
She's not getting in a car. It's not safe.
Mark
Callie...
It's not safe. The last time she was in a car, she nearly died, we both nearly died. Get-- get her out of that thing. Give her to me, Mark. I'm- I'm not kidding, [crying] get- get her out of that thing.
Callie... Callie... Okay, you're right. You are absolutely right. Cars are not safe for children. Okay, neither are bookcases or squirrels, strong winds, people who sneeze. They're all going to get your baby. But honey, you don't feel this way because you were in an accident. You feel this way because you are a parent. It'll pass... mostly. Some of it never will.
[voiceover] There are distinct differences, between male and female brains.
[voiceover] Female brains have a larger hippocampus...which usually makes them better at retention and memory.
[voiceover] Male brains have a bigger parietal cortex, which helps when fending off an attack.
[voiceover] Male brains confront challenges differently than female brains.
Mark
[voiceover] Women are hardwired to communicate with language. Detail. Empathy. Men, not so much.
[voiceover] It doesn't mean we're any less capable of emotion.
[voiceover] We can talk about our feelings. It's just that, most of the time, we'd really rather not.
Grey's Anatomy · 1,393 quotes
