Edward Nygma quotes from Gotham

Lucius Fox

Ed, you killed six people, seven including Penguin. You just announced to the entire city that you are a villain and a murderer. Ed, if there is any part of your mind that is not insane, listen to me: You need help. Turn yourself in.

Edward Nygma

My actions seem mad to you.

Lucius Fox

To anyone.

Edward Nygma

I... I just killed the best friend that I ever had. My search for a teacher or an enemy, that was just me trying to hold on to him for a little bit longer. But now, I know who I am without him.

Lucius Fox

So who are you now?

Edward Nygma

Oh, c'mon, Foxy. I'm the Riddler!

Edward Nygma

I want you to know that our friendship meant something to me. I cared about you, and I miss you.

Oswald Cobblepot

Gee. Almost makes up for being dead. I hate to burst your bubble, but no one is going to afraid of "The Riddler".

Edward Nygma

Maybe not yet. But they will be.

Jim Gordon

I considered you a friend.

Edward Nygma

I can sneak up on you, or be right in front of you without you even knowing. But when I reveal myself, you will never be the same. What am I?

Jim Gordon

I don't care, Ed...

Edward Nygma

Betrayal. It's how every friendship ends. So what good are friends, anyway?

Edward Nygma

You will always fail, Oswald, because you will always let your base emotions drive you. Hate. Anger. Fear. Love.

Oswald Cobblepot

Shut up!

Edward Nygma

You wanna know why I could never love someone like you, Oswald?

Oswald Cobblepot

I'm warning you...

Edward Nygma

Because you are a spoiled child who throws a tantrum anytime he doesn't get what he wants! Especially when what he wants doesn't want him back.

In anticipation of our partnership, I have been working on a few riddles.

Edward Nygma

Yes, riddles! That's exactly what I need. That's gonna make me feel like myself again. Fire away.

Okay. What's black and white and read all over?

Edward Nygma

Easy. A zebra with a gaping hole. Next.

Um... no, it's actually a newspaper.

Edward Nygma

That's ridiculous. There's nothing red in a newspaper. Next.

Well it makes sense if you...

Edward Nygma

Next!

I have a face and two arms, but no body. What am I?

Edward Nygma

A deformed baby. Come on! Surely you can do better than this!

The answer is a clock. Y'know, hands? [pause] I think there's something wrong with your brain, Ed.

Edward Nygma

There is nothing wrong with my brain! The problem is your riddles. Bring me a riddle that is worthy of my name!

Edward Nygma

You people have pills for everything! Insomnia. Anxiety. You have to have something for me!

I don't know. A pill to reverse the effects of having your brain frozen and unfrozen? That's kind of specific.

Edward Nygma

Doctor Leslie Thompkins. Wow.

Dr. Leslie Thompkins

I heard a rumor you were frozen. I should have known it was too good to be true.

Edward Nygma

You're not still mad at me, are you?

Dr. Leslie Thompkins

Mad at you for what? Killing Kristin Kringle? Or framing Jim for murder so he'd be in prison when I lost our child? [deadpan] I'm over all that. Let's be friends.

Edward Nygma

I know about your clinic. I'm guessing that Cherry lets you have that as long as you work these fights. That's your deal, right?

Dr. Leslie Thompkins

So?

Edward Nygma

So, I'm guessing that that means something to you, which makes you vulnerable to... [suddenly confused] to, um...

Dr. Leslie Thompkins

Blackmail? Threats?

Edward Nygma

Yes! Yes! Both of those!

Dr. Leslie Thompkins

All right, let's hear it. What's your brilliant scheme?

Edward Nygma

What?

Dr. Leslie Thompkins

You said you were going to force me to help you. So, what is your threat? Hit me.

Edward Nygma

If you don't help me, I am going to... do... something to that clinic!

Dr. Leslie Thompkins

[bursts out laughing] Oh my God, you really aren't smart!

Dr. Leslie Thompkins

[whispering] Where do I start?

Edward Nygma

I don't know. Make them happy. Give them something to cheer for.

Dr. Leslie Thompkins

Drinks on the house!

Edward Nygma

Good move.

Oswald Cobblepot

Ed. You must be here to gloat.

Edward Nygma

Correct.

Oswald Cobblepot

And why not? I am in an insane asylum, being pummeled by lunatics... but at least I'm not a moron.

Edward Nygma

I may not be the man I once was, but I have many things you don't have. A purpose. Friends. You have neither of those, and I wanted you to see that.

Oswald Cobblepot

No. I know you. There's something else going on. Something else brought you here.

Edward Nygma

There's nothing else. I wanted you to see how well I am doing, and I wanted to see how miserable you are. Mission accomplished.

Oswald Cobblepot

Ed, I'm going to be out of here soon. And when I am, I am gonna wipe that smile off your face... preferably with a chainsaw.

[whistles] You don't look good. Think you might be exceeding your recommended dosage. You experiencing... "Trembling Extremities?" Check. "Cognitive Imparement?" Definite check. Though, to be fair, how would you know? [laughs]

Edward Nygma

SHUT UP!!

Take all the pills you want, Ed. I'm only getting stronger. Soon, I'm gonna be out... and the FUN begins!

Edward Nygma

No! I won't let you. 'Cause I know what you'll do.

Oh, you mean, kill Lee? Yeah, I guess I will do that. And you can't stop me-

Edward Nygma

There are things that I can do!

Like what? You need to face it, pal. The only way to get rid of me, is to kill yourself.

Edward Nygma

...I guess you are smarter than me.

...You wouldn't-

Edward Nygma

I would. Oh, yeah.

Edward Nygma

You aren't stringing me along, are you Lee?

Leslie Thompkins

Don't you want to find out? The answer to the riddle?

It's only fair you die slow and painful, to pay for JoJo!

Edward Nygma

Who's JoJo?

JoJo was in Haven when you blew it up. [shows him a picture of a dog]

Edward Nygma

[laughs] This is a joke, right? 300 people died in Haven!

[scoffs] We don't care about people! [tearing up] Look at how happy JoJo was. He always had a smile on his face.

Edward Nygma

You anthropomorphizing nincompoop! Dogs can't smile!

Barbara Kean

So the government is behind Haven and the supply helicopter. [gestures to Nygma] And they did it with a chip in this one's head.

Edward Nygma

Is that really the craziest thing you've ever heard, Barbara?

Edward Nygma

OW! Would you be careful?!

Lucius Fox

If you stop moving, this will go a lot faster.

Edward Nygma

Well, if you'd be more careful, I wouldn't potato all the longlegs in the hidden spoon!

Barbara Kean

What just happened?

Lucius Fox

I believe the chip is installed against his speech center.

Barbara Kean

[chuckles] Do it again.

Lucius Fox

The human brain is not a plaything, Miss Kean.

Edward Nygma

Please don't habituate the curtain rod!