Juliet, Dean Reuther and others in “Juliet Doesn't Live Here Anymore”

I have proof that Serena Van der Woodsen is having an affair with her professor.

Miss Sharp, I am with friends. This is the one night of the year I can try to put everything else out of my mind and enjoy myself.

Blair

[Enters with Nate, Serena and Collin] Dean Reuther, may I please have a moment with you?

Of course you're involved with this Miss Waldorf, I told you and Miss Van der Woodsen to stay off my radar.

Dean Reuther I am not lying.

What's going on?

Nothing that concerns you professor, or concerns anyone for the moment.

Actually it does concern Collin, he was the one in the photos with Serena.

Is that why you resigned your position today?

While it's true that I resigned because of my involvement with a student, it's nobody's business who that student is. All that matters is that the responsibility is mine and I took it, by leaving my post.

That's somewhat admirable, Collin, and while usually it's the professor in the professor student relationship that takes propriety, if that student is under the suspicion of trading sex for grades in the past, I think we might need to examine the situation a little more closely.

Vanessa

Let me get my camera.

[Sticks out the flashdrive] Here, look as close as you like.

Blair

[Takes the flashdrive] Let me help you with that. [Drops it in her glass of champagne] Whoops. You didn't wanna look at those photos anyway because it wasn't Serena in them. It was me.

Serena

Blair, you don't have to do this.

Blair

Why would I jeopardize my college career by lying? [To the Dean] So, go ahead, fire Collin. Oh wait, he already quit. So let's just go in and enjoy some jeté. Allegro.

Chuck

[Comes up from behind Blair] If I could say something. I for one can fully corroborate Miss Waldorf's story. She was indeed having an affair with Professor Forrester. I know this because I keep tabs on everyone Blair sees and talks to, due to my insatiable jealousy. Though she did state something to the effect that he didn't quite satisfy her like I used to.

Blair

It's true.

Don't you see? They're all protecting each other.

Vanessa

This is what they always do.

[To Vanessa] I'm sorry. Who are you? [To Juliet] Miss Sharp, the reality is that with no proof I can't tell who is telling the truth.

Yeah, well there was proof! Until Blair drowned it.

Juliet, I don't like tattletales much more than I like young women who use their sexuality to further their academic careers. So if you will please excuse me, I'm going to try my best to to enjoy this performance. Which, hopefully, is a little more graceful than the one I've just seen. Good evening.