Leo Kakinoki quotes from Ghost Stories

What are you doing? Quit following us!

You two morons are just walking in front of me. Watch for dogs.

Go home. We're going to school.

Sounds good. I don't have anything better to do.

You're a cat now, stupid.

For your information, I've been haunting that school before you two blew into town.

I think he's got a point.

Don't take his side, if you know what's good for you. I can't believe our sweet precious cat is now possessed by a Keebler elf reject. With bad gas.

That'll teach you to make fun of me. The Lord Amanojaku.

[coming from behind, with Hajime] This is fascinating! Even though he's trapped in a cat's body, he still possesses ghostly powers. Kinda like David Blaine.

Save it for the science fair.

You're just jealous of my psychical research. You know what Harvard's president said about girls and science.

You may know about science, but you don't know diddly about girls.

I'm just waiting for a nice Jewish girl! Yeah.

[dusting herself off] Break it up, ladies.

Hey, wait! Shouldn't you guys know how to do it? I mean, how to turn Caya back to normal?

What?

That's right! You're the psychical researcher, aren't you?

That is my area of expertise. But except for a few pale Trekkies, this is the creepiest thing I've ever come in contact with.

Well, then. What good are you?

You're not coming up with ideas.

[annoyed] If I could, I would've said my goodbyes long ago.

Well, we have learned one thing.

What'd we learn? What'd I miss?

Yes, one thing.

What?

[to Satsuki] Your light blue Hanes are total chode material.

I guess the school fine arts festival's not gonna happen.

I can't believe it. And I stayed up all night working on my costume and props. [shows his handiwork]

Oh, my. What a gifted seamstress. I hope you're not a homosexual.

A Jew who can act and sew, so obviously I'm gay. I'm not gay, you born-again homophobe halfwit!

A car accident, huh? Must've been hit by an old Chinaman. I don't mean to be racist, but those people cannot drive.

I know. [pause] But that's beside the point. I think he was lonely.

After all that training, you're still such a little bitch.

But for a ghost, Datto wasn't such a bad guy.

Yeah, weren't you the one checking out his butt at the track the other day?

You can shut up. Narc.

No! It's okay. I mean, he had a nice butt. Even I noticed. It's okay.

Just drop it!

I don't know why you're so ashamed about it. You're a butt chick. I don't mind.

What are you doing?

Datto can have it. The pin keeps sticking my nipple. Here! [hurls the medal into the sky]

Aw. Little bitch.

You know, kids would stop talking about you if you'd get out more. Kinda de-geek yourself.

Geeks run the world!

But they're not getting their pee-pees waxed now, are they? [holds out a fast food restaurant coupon] Here.

What's the catch?

Oh, my God! Their stock is in the toilet! And now they have fruit salads, chicken tenders, and tofu fries!

Why would you eat there? Didn't you see Super Size Me?

They had a coupon in the paper, and I know what a tight ass you are. Besides, they've got an Æon Flux giggity meal.

What?! An Æon Flux giggity meal?! Yes! Yes! Oh, my God! A pocket-sized Charlize Theron of my very own to carry around with me all day long! SWEET! There is a God!

Better get extra napkins with yours. Can't believe I said that. So it's settled! Let's meet at the creepy train station.