Alphonse quotes from Fullmetal Alchemist

Edward

So, what happened? How did the Ishbalians respond to your weapon?

They didn't.

Alphonse

What?

Every gathering point of resistance the State Alchemists were sent to, they were all wiped out in a single night.

Edward

[talking about Scar] He's dragging people in who had nothing to do with it. How can you talk about legitimacy? He's a fraud. He's on a tirade of personal vengeance and he hides behind this excuse of "God's will," so he can claim its noble.

Alphonse

Still, if someone were to take you away from me, brother, I think I might do the same thing. Isn't that equivalent exchange?

Edward

No! Thats not how the principle works! Haven't you learned that yet? Destroying lives doesn't bring lives back. We all just need to live and be content while we can.

Edward

Doctor Marcoh, why don't you let us hide you in our hometown for a while? It's just three days on a train from here, right?

Alphonse

It might be a bit hard on us going back there though.

Edward

Not at all, we have friends there, the Rockbells, they make automail, I'm sure they'll be...

Rockbell? No, I can't, I can't go there, I'm sorry!

Edward

Say something Al, are you still with me?

Alphonse

You idiot! (Punches Ed)

Edward

...! What’s that for?!

Alphonse

Why didn’t you run away when I told you to?!

Edward

Because, steel-for-brains, then he would have killed you!

Alphonse

So you decided to die instead?! That’s really smart!

Edward

Don’t call your older brother an ‘idiot’, idiot!

Alphonse

That’s not how we do things! (Ed grunts)… Live and be content while we can, live to research more alchemy, so one day we can get our bodies back… That is how we do things brother! Dying!? And dying by yourself!? And leaving me on my own!?! That’s something I won’t let you do! Oh great! Now my arm’s fallen off too! Today is a terrible day!

Edward

We’re really fallin’ apart at the seams, aren’t we? Everyone who sees us must think we’re a joke…

Alphonse

But we’re alive, right?

Edward

Yeah… We are that, Al.

Roy

You see? I came out fine as ever.

(Sighs) You know, maybe it’d do you some good to get your hand slapped every once in a while.

Roy

Don’t blame me, that guy’s a wall… I can’t figure him out… (Al’s scream is heard; Roy and Hawkeye look towards the break room)

Creation follows destruction! I’ll fix him up nice and pretty!

Alphonse

Uh! That’s OK!

Roy

Bonding a soul to steel is no walk in the park, Fullmetal’s the only one that can fix Al now, go ahead ask him.

Edward

That’s right, it’s my burden… But before I do anything I have to get my other arm back…

Well, that is an interesting fix, isn’t it? I mean, if the great Edward can’t use his alchemy…

He’s just a useless teen with a grumpy-ass-attitude.

Edward

Anyway… I’ll have to take some leave now… I'm going back to my mechanic. You know the one, don’t you?

Roy

Sure, Ed, how can I forget? I saw you at her house, unconscious, with that same stump of an arm you have now, bawling in your sleep, "It hurts! I'm going to pee my pants!" So tough.

So where you going to go once you’re fixed?

Edward

Central… I’ve got something to look up in the library there…

That’s a heck of a trip you’ll need some protection. I would volunteer but… Well, since the Führer going straight to Central and I’m part of his escort, I can’t go.

Roy

They just put me back in charge here; I’ve got to look after this place.

And I’ve got to look after the Colonel.

You could send me, but I don’t know how much help I’d be up against a fanatical alchemist serial killer.

(Ad-lib they agree with Havoc)

That settles it, send me! I’ll protect the boys on their journey for repairs and investigation!

Edward

We don’t need an escort!

Really, Ed, what do you plan to do if Scar shows up while you’re missing that arm?

Can’t fight; can’t exactly carry your hobbled brother to safety either.

Alphonse

(Nervous laugh)

Children should listen to adults!

Edward

Ah! You can’t call us children! Al, why don’t you stick up for us here!?!

Alphonse

That is the first time I've been treated like a kid since I became a suit of armor!! Thank you!

The train leaves soon Edward Elric… We’d better go pack our bags.

Alphonse

Uh… This is the first time I've been treated like luggage!

Edward

(Cramped by Armstrong) Spacious…

(Knocks and salutes Edward)

Newspaper? I’ve got tea, too!

(Motions for the kid to leave him alone) Hey, I've got a message from Roy.

Edward

You mean the Colonel?

He said, "Don't die under my command; you're enough of a pain without the paperwork." And that was it.

Edward

Tell him, "Fine, there's no way I'm dying before you do, you morally bankrupt Colonel with a God complex."… And tell him to take this gorilla escort here off my hands too.

Alright, easy. (Edward looks away) Look, Ed. I don’t know what Marcoh said to upset you, but I found some info you might find helpful. About three years ago we found the remains of a girl, who’d been turned into a chimera, I’m sure you remember.

Edward

Nina!

The way she was torn apart… Turns out it’s identical to the way Scar’s been killing people.

Edward

(Gasps) Thanks, Hughes. That does help; now I can take him on.

Edward

You're aware that you reek of sheep, right? It's disgusting.

Alphonse

Well, excuse me for being cargo!

Alphonse

There's something wrong with me.

Edward

So listen Al... There's this thing see, something I've been meaning to tell you for a long time now, but I've been kind of scared I guess of what your reaction would be.

Alphonse

What?

Edward

Ah, dammit it's just...

Alphonse

Tell me!

Edward

No, it's nothing, forget it.

Alphonse

Brother tell me!

Alphonse

Uh, you're talking to the wrong guy.

Edward

(moaning) I'm used to it by now.

Huh? Really? You mean this little guy?

Edward

Eh~?

I'm sorry sir, sorry! I just thought you'd be fuller, and uh, more metal!

Edward

Ugh, shut up! Come on, Major, we don't need babysitters anymore! We've both been fully repaired!

Edward

So these are Marcoh’s notes. On the surface they appear to be an ordinary cookbook...

Alphonse

You really think the secret to the stone is in here?

Edward

It does make sense. Marcoh didn’t want just anyone to read it so he wrote it in code. And as for the cookbook disguise, you know what they say, “Alchemy was born in the kitchen.” So now all we have to do is crack this secret language of his. No sweat.

Alphonse

Mm…

Edward

Damn, so much for that whole ‘No sweat’ business. Get markers, make a few columns, I thought it’d be easy!

Alphonse

It’d be a whole lot faster if we could just ask Marcoh.

Edward

We’re trying to keep the military out of the loop here, Al, and Marcoh’s in the Führer's custody now...

Wakey, wakey! So how you doing there, boys?

Edward

Lieutenant Colonel! What’s the matter, been to busy to come say ‘hello’?

It’s these damn ‘Scar spottings’ lately. It’s got us chasing our own tails. So, Al did you get the ‘full-body repair’ you needed?

Alphonse

Yes, sir. Good as new.

They sure are chummy with the Lieutenant Colonel, don’t you think?

Lieutenant Colonel Hughes. If there were to be an attack here, we can not insure the safety of these two as we’ve been ordered. They should return to the command center now.

Edward

I told you Ross, don’t get in my way!

Lieutenant Colonel as long as Scar remains at large, security of State Alchemists must be a top priority,

Sorry, Ed, but I’m afraid Lieutenant Ross does have a point.

Edward

Don’t say that...

But then again, this really isn’t my jurisdiction, why don’t you take it up with Major Armstrong?

(Ad-lib they don’t want to)

(Regains composure)

Edward

Lieutenant Colonel, we’re close to it now, I can feel it! I’m begging!

Hmmm... What I’d like to do is give you extra protection, Ed, but between hunting down Scar and scrambling to replace the case files that were destroyed in the fire, my men are all completely tied up right now.

Edward

All your case files? You mean they were stored in the First Branch, too?

Yeah, affidavits, suspect list, crime scene logs, all of it.

Edward

You’re in luck...!

Edward

How can this be possible…?

Alphonse

I don’t know.

Edward

After all this time, years of searching, sacrificing, and this is the answer we get! The secret ingredient to make a Philosopher’s stone, the only way to make it work, live humans, and in mass numbers!

Edward

God must really hate people who go against him. I was 11 years old then, and he still has me marked. Every time I thought it was in reach, he’s pulled it away, so I’d fall on my face, and then, when I finally got my fist around it… He raises his big obnoxious foot, and kicks me in the teeth. Just face it, Al. It’s going to be this way our whole lives.

Alphonse

Don’t say that…

Edward

I really thought it was going to work out brother, we would find the philosopher’s stone, and it would all be ok.

Alphonse

It still will be, we’ll find the stone, brother. And we’ll get our bodies back to normal. And be happy. People say you’re a dog of the military, that you’ve sold your soul to get this far. But that isn’t true, and it hasn’t stopped us, and this won’t either. We’ve worked too hard.

Alphonse

Brother? Let’s look at it again, from the beginning.

Edward

I’ve looked at it enough.

Alphonse

But there’s a chance we misread something, maybe we got it wrong.

Edward

I said ‘I’ve had enough’.

Alphonse

But what if our code’s wrong?! What if that’s not what it said, or maybe we missed some key paragraph, like a loophole, we should read the whole thing again.

Edward

I said ‘Enough’! (accidentally knocks a teacup to Al's face) Uh!

Alphonse

Brother…?

Is something wrong, sir?

Edward

It’s just a broken cup, go back in the hall. Sorry, Al.

Alphonse

Yeah…

So, Ed, that’s really the end of it? You won’t regret it then, going back before you’re finished? That’s interesting. I didn’t realize what you were looking for was so incidental you’d abandon it this easily.

Edward

Stop going on like you know what you’re talking about. You don’t know anything.

Wrong Ed. I know what you boys have been searching for is the Philosopher's stone. And I know it’s created by sacrificing human lives. (Boys gasp) I know it was uncalled for, but I was listening through the door.

Edward

Well, if you eavesdropped you must know. It’s pointless to chase after it now. Leave us alone.

You really are a child.

Edward

Uh!

You’re scared. Frightened, you might have to admit, everything you’ve done was wasted effort. … Am I wrong? It’s ok to feel lost. And not have reasons. But verifying whether Marcoh’s theory is the truth of not is worth something in itself if you ask me. After all, what you boys have been searching for is a lot bigger then you, or Al. Why don’t you try searching for it a little longer, Ed, but without worries, about the final result?

Edward

You’re right, it’s like a book. Just because you’re mad and stop reading, it doesn’t change the way it ends.

Alphonse

That’s right!

Edward

We’ve had roadblocks and we’ve conquered them all! I’ll be damned if we stop halfway! We’ll take this all the way to the finish! Let’s do this, Al!

Alphonse

Right!

(Sighs in relief)

Just like a monkey, aren't you?

Edward

You better watch your mouth!

It’s been so long since I've had such responsive prey. But judging from your wound and your breathing, it won't last much longer. My body, unlike yours, does not know fatigue. Give up any hope you've had, as we speak, my colleague is disposing of your companion outside; you can’t rely on him to help you now.

Edward

Heh… So this colleague of yours, is he strong?

Yes, he is, though not as strong as myself. (Edward begins to laugh) What’s so funny?

Edward

(Sighs) I’ve got nothing to worry about then. My companion as you put it, I’ve fought him plenty of times and I’ve never beat him once.

Ah! Quit that! Hold still so I can cut you up! (Attacks Alphonse) Miserable heathen! You’re spoiling at me aren’t you!? I’ll spiel your insides! I’ll show you how thinly you slice! (Alphonse trips backwards on a rock) NOW YOU’RE FRIGHTENED! I’LL CARVE OUT A SHOULDER ROAST! (Alphonse breaks the knife, and grabs the other one, #66 gasps as Alphonse punches him sending him backwards making his helmet come off Alphonse gasps.) Now you’ve gone and done it, you brute! You’ve knocked off my head!

Alphonse

You’re empty inside…

Yes. That’s what they said when they sentenced me… And thanks to the circumstances, it ended up quite literal… You don’t recognize me like this do you?

Alphonse

What do you mean?

Don’t tell me you forgot! After all it was thanks to you’re help catching me that I ended up here… A condemned man… #66 was my name on death row. But back when I was flesh, and entrails, I had better names… Barry the Butcher… Or my favorite… Barry the Chopper...!

Alphonse

Barry the Chopper? (Flashbacks) You’re the one who kidnapped Winry…

That’s right! And after being caught, Imprisoned, and executed… I’ve come back from a pit of fire to take my revenge on YOU, maggot! AHAHAHAHA!

Alphonse

(Tilts head innocently) Is that so?

“Is that so?” What do you mean: “Is that so?”?!?! People get terrified when serial killers come back from the dead and an empty suit of armor moves on its own! You should be saying “Ah!” or “Ah! Why he doesn’t have a body!” What’s wrong with you?! Don’t you realize how horrifying I am?!

Alphonse

(Takes off helmet) Take it easy… You’re going to hurt my feelings…

Hmm… Are you an executed prisoner, too?

Alphonse

No. I’m not a crook.

Hmm… I suppose not… No… Why would you be helping the police? But who cares where you came from!? I know your weakness now! You’d better beg for mercy! Your life belongs to me! If I destroy the blood seal on your armor you’ll die!

Alphonse

The same goes for you… Right?

Ah! But I still have the advantage you rotten beast! You don’t know where my blood seal is!

Alphonse

And you don’t know where my seal is either…

(Freaks out) Well then I’ll just have to chop you up until I find it! And you can’t do that! ‘Cause you don’t have a knife! Ah!

Alphonse

(Rubs his helmet) Why do I have to get the crazy one?

Winry

Edward! You didn’t tell me you were in the hospital for this!

Edward

Yeah, well, one thing, lead to another… He-he…

Winry

This is nothing to laugh about!

Edward

What’s wrong?

Winry

I didn’t do the maintenance on your auto-mail the way I should have, and now… This is my fault…

Edward

No don’t say that! There are a lot of other things to blame! Right Al?

Alphonse

Right…

Edward

There, you see? And Al doesn’t lie!

Winry

Yeah, but…

Edward

Your maintenance was perfect, it always has been! It’s complicated machinery, and I’m slinging it all around! It was bound to jam up some time! I mean honestly, the timing was pretty good, if it’d stopped earlier, I’d be a lot worse off! It broke because I was rough with it, don’t worry!

Winry

(Thinks) Could he actually not have noticed I forgot to use that screw? (Talking) YOU’RE RIGHT, ED! YOU’RE TOO ROUGH! A RECKLESS KLUTZ, REALLY! AHAHAHAHA!

Edward

Hey…

Lieutenant Colonel, sorry to interrupt, but there’s a call from Colonel Mustang.

Yo, Roy! Good timing, I’ve got great news!

Roy

What?! Your soldiers have found Scar?!

No, you obsessed idiot! How would that be great news? Did you honestly forget? Tomorrow’s Alicia’s birthday! We’re throwing her a party and everything!

Roy

Unless you want to become charcoal, Maes, you’d better tell me the news from Central!

Don’t worry, if anything important happens, I’ll let you know, but in the meantime, make sure you send my daughter a present! Bye now!

Roy

Uh! Rrrrggggg!

But, sir, are you sure it’s okay not to tell him anything, about the boys?

Yeah, I’m sure, right now it’s better if he doesn’t know anything…

Right…

But enough about that, you got those reports?

YEAH! Working non-stop without sleep, I’ve managed to finish them all!

(Takes a sip of his drink) Great, here’s a list of what’s next, doll.

(Faints)

Winry

How you doing’? Huh? Well, Ed it looks like you’re done with your dinner…

Edward

Uhuh…

Winry

Don’t be a baby. It won’t hurt much. Huh? (’moo’ is heard) You didn't drink your milk. (Ed twitches) Edward...

Edward

(grumbling) You drink it. I hate milk. It's like drinking vomit.

Winry

(shoving it in his face) WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! MILK'S GOOD FOR YOU! DRINK IT!

Edward

(shoving it away) FORGET IT! I HATE WHAT I HATE! IT'S NOT LIKE I'LL DIE BECAUSE I DON'T DRINK THAT CRAP!

Winry

JEEZ! AND THIS IS THE REASON YOU'RE ALWAYS GOING TO BE THE SIZE OF A BEAN!

Edward

A BEAN?!

Winry

Yeah, a bean. Right, Al?

Alphonse

Just do what she says, Ed. Drink the dumb milk.

Edward

Yeah, sure, easy for you to say, Al, you're lucky. You didn't have to drink anything to get that big!

Alphonse

Shut up. It wasn't my choice to be this way!

Edward

You’re right, Al… I’m sorry…

Winry

Hey, what’s the matter are you two fighting?

Edward

Al, all this time I've been too afraid to ask you, but I need to know the truth, okay? It's my fault you don't have a real body anymore... Do you hate me? Ahh! [A bomb explodes behind them, destroying the wall Edward had created]

Alphonse

What?

Edward

Do you? I wouldn't blame you if you did, Al, but I gotta know. Do you hate me for all that's happened?

Alphonse

That's what you've been trying to ask me?

Winry

Al! Behind you! [Barry the Chopper/Number 66 runs to attack Al from behind]

Alphonse

Brother, I could never... I could never hate you!

Winry

What do you mean we’re not going to Dublith?

Alphonse

Don’t worry; we’ll still take you to Rush Valley.

Winry

Well, okay then, but what about your teacher? Didn’t you want to ask her about another way to fix yourselves besides the Philosopher’s Stone?

Edward

If we go for any reason, we’ll be killed.

Winry

Wait a sec… killed?

Alphonse

Brother never told her he became a state alchemist.

Edward

If she could tell by our bodies we tried human transmutation… Personally, I’d like to live a little longer.

Alphonse

I, at least, want to fall in love before I’m through.

Edward

Even if those weren’t issues… I just don’t think it’d be right asking her that.

Winry

Then where are we going?

Edward

We’ve learned about a pretty sizable Ishballian refugee camps hidden in the mountains to the south. I think Scar and the others might have gone there…

Winry

You’re going after Scar...?

Alphonse

It’s been said the Philosopher's Stone was created in Ishbal, but no one ever taught them alchemy. In fact, their culture rejected it.

Edward

I’m going to beat the pulp out of him, and force him to tell me their secret.

Alphonse

Brother, about Scar, he’s really not that bad of a person, ‘ya know?

Edward

He murdered dozens of people, and he’s done it by using alchemy. I can’t forgive him for that.