Dammit! This is all your fault! This was supposed to be like the greatest day of my life, you know. My son is being born and... I should be in there, you know. Instead I'm stuck in a closet with you.
The woman I love is having a baby today, I've been waiting for this just as much as you have.
No, believe me, no one has been waiting for this just as much as I have. Okay, and you know what the funny thing is? When this thing is over, you get to go home with the baby, okay? Where does that leave me?
You get to be the baby's father. Everyone knows who you are. And who am I? There's Fathers Day, there's Mothers Day, there's no Lesbian Lover Day.
Every day is Lesbian Lover Day.
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