Doctor Who quotes

Would you care for some tea?

[slaps tea from Dalek's tea tray] Stop this! What are you doing here? What do you want?!

We seek only to help you.

To do what?

To win the war.

Really? Which war?

I do not understand.

This war against the Nazis or your war against the rest of the universe? The war against all lifeforms that are not Dalek?

I do not understand. I am your soldier.

Okay, okay! [Picks up a large spanner] Okay, soldier, defend yourself! [beats Dalek with spanner repeatedly]

What the devil?!

You do not require tea?

Stop him! Prime Minister, please!

Doctor!

Come on!

What the devil?

Come on! Fight back! I know you will!

I must protest!

You hate me! You want to kill me! Well, go on! Kill me! Kill me!

Doctor, be careful!

Please desist from striking me. I am your soldier.

[He accentuates each word by hitting the Dalek each time] YOU! ARE! MY! ENEMY! And I am yours! You are everything I despise. The worst thing in all creation. I've defeated you. Time and time again, I've defeated you. I sent you back into the Void. I saved the whole of reality from you. I AM THE DOCTOR AND YOU ARE THE DALEKS!

[long pause, then] Correct.

So what do we do? Is this what we do now? Chase after them?

This is what I do, yeah, and it's dangerous, so you wait here.

So I've got to stay safe down here... in the middle of the London Blitz?!

Safest it gets around me.

Well, what does he expect us to do now?

KBO, of course.

What?

Keep Buggering On.

The question is, what do we do now? Either you turn off your clever machine or I'll blow you and you new paradigm into eternity.

And yourself.

Occupational hazard.

Scan reveals nothing; TARDIS self destruct device non-existent!

All right, [takes a bite out of the 'self-destruct'] it's a Jammie Dodger, but I was promised tea!

Doctor, call off your attack.

Haha, what? And let you scuttle off back to the future? No fear! This is the end for you. The final end.

Call off the attack, or we will destroy the Earth.

I'm not stupid, mate, you've just played your last card.

Bracewell is a bomb!

You're bluffing. Deception's second nature to you. There isn't a sincere bone in your body, there isn't a bone in your body.

His power is derived from an Oblivion Continuum. Call off your attack or we will detonate the android!

No, no, this is my best chance ever. The last of the Daleks - I can rid the whole universe of you, once and for all!

Then do it. But we will shatter the planet below. The Earth will die screaming!

[bitterly] Yeah, and if I let you go, you'll be stronger than ever. A new race of Daleks...

Then choose, Doctor! Destroy the Daleks or save the Earth! Begin countdown of Oblivion Continuum! Choose, Doctor! Choose! Choose!

The writing... the graffiti: Old High Gallifreyan. The lost language of the Time Lords. There were days, there were many days, where these words could burn stars, raise up empires, and topple gods.

What does this one say?

[hesitates, then, exasperatedly] "Hello, sweetie!"

Oh, you are all "Mr. Grumpy Face" today?

A Weeping Angel, Amy, is the deadliest, most powerful, most malevolent life form evolution has ever produced, and right now one of them is trapped inside that wreckage and I'm supposed to climb in after it with a screwdriver and a torch, and assuming I survive the radiation long enough and assuming the whole ship doesn't explode in my face, do something incredibly clever which I haven't actually thought of yet. That's my day, that's what I'm up to. Any questions?

Is River Song your wife? Because she's someone from your future, and the way she talks to you, I've never seen anyone do that. She's kind of like, you know, "Heel, boy!" She's Mrs. Doctor from the future, isn't she? Is she going to be your wife one day?

[beat] Yes, you're right. I am definitely "Mr. Grumpy Face" today.

What do you mean it's a statue when you see it?

The Weepings Angels can only move if they're unseen. So legend has it.

No, it's not a legend, it's a quantum lock. In the sight of any living being, the Angels literally cease to exist. They're just stone: the ultimate defense mechanism.

What? Being a stone?

Being a stone... until you turn your back.

Amy Pond, you are magnificent, and I'm sorry.

It's okay, I understand. You've got to leave me.

Oh, no, I'm not leaving you, never! I'm sorry about this! [bites her hand. Amy yelps] There, see? Not stone, now run!

You bit me!

Yeah, and you're alive.

Oh, I've got a mark, look at my hand!

Yes, and you're alive! Did I mention?

Blimey, your teeth, have you got space teeth?!

Yeah, alive, all I'm saying!

Doctor? Can I speak to the Doctor, please?

Hello, Angels. What's your problem?

Your power will not last much longer, and the Angels will be with you shortly. Sorry, sir.

Why are you telling me this?

There's something the Angels are very keen you should know before the end.

Which is?

I died in fear.

I'm sorry?

You told me my fear would keep me alive. But I died afraid, in pain and alone. You made me trust you, and when it mattered, you let me down.

What are they doing?

They're trying to make him angry.

I'm sorry, sir. The Angels were very keen for you to know that.

Well then... the Angels have made their second mistake, because I'm not going to let that pass. I'm sorry you're dead, Bob, but I swear to whatever is left of you, they will be sorrier.

Sorry, can I ask again? You mentioned a "mistake" we made?

Oh, big, big mistake, really huge. Didn't anyone ever tell you? There's one thing you never put in a trap. If you're smart, if you value your continued existence, if you have any plans about seeing tomorrow, there's one thing you never, ever put in a trap.

And what would that be, sir?

Me.

What if the gravity fails?

I've thought about that.

And?

We'll all plunge to our deaths. See? I've thought about it! [examines the door] Ah, the security protocols are still live. There's no way to override them; it's impossible!

How impossible?

Two minutes.

Dr. Song, I've lost good clerics today. This Doctor, you trust him?

I absolutely trust him.

He's not just some sort of madman?

I absolutely trust him.

Our mission is to make this wreckage safe and neutralize the Angels. Until that is achieved—

[strained] Father Octavian, when the Doctor's in the room, your one and only 'mission' is to keep him alive long enough to get everyone else home! And trust me, it's not easy! Now if he's dead back there, I'll never forgive myself. And if he's alive, I'll never forgive him. [Pause] And Doctor, you're standing right behind me, aren't you?

Oh, yeah.

I hate you.

No, you don't.

We're too exposed everywhere. And Amy can't move. And besides, that's not the plan.

There's a plan?

I don't know. I haven't finished talking yet.

Please, sir, you have to leave me.

You'll die.

I will die in the knowledge that my courage did not desert me at the end. For that, I thank God and bless the path that takes you to safety.

I wish I had known you better.

I think, sir, you know me at my best.

Ready?

[closing his eyes] Content.