A character in Dirty Jobs
Played by Mike Rowe
Dirty Jobs · 41 quotes
Most-quoted character in Dirty Jobs: in 39 of its 41 quotes
[Mike and Dave have added hops into another vat.]
MikeHow hot is it in there?
About 212 degrees. Boiling point.
MikeThat's boiling, yeah. That's why you keep that [lid] shut.
Yeah.
MikeSafety first.
[Dave agrees]
MikeWhere are your safety goggles, Dave?
Uhh…
MikeUh-huh. I'll have a chat with OSHA.
[Mike and Dave are looking down a vat that Mike is going to clean]
MikeHow hot is it down there?
148 degrees.
MikeWell it’s a dry heat.
Roach Armageddon is about to commence.
MikeBring it on.
MikeNow does it occur to the crab that the chicken, being a land based animal, has no business at the bottom of the river?
No, he's never seen a chicken.
MikeYou've seen worse, haven't you?
No, I haven't seen much worse, honestly.
MikeWe conclude with a sandjob?
Always.
MikeI love a happy ending!
[Mike and Todd are shoveling sludge]
So how does it rate?
MikeOn the seven levels of hell? Six...and a half.
I'm glad I could accommodate you.
Mike[referring to a drum of sludge] How much does it weigh?
About, uh, six hundred pounds. So let me get you the uh...
MikeYeah, get me something, like six other guys.
[Todd returns with a dolly]
MikeOh a dolly. Hello, dolly.
[while bottling honey in a bear] That's a two pound bear and that goes for $6.
MikeSo if a two pound bear goes for $6 and a one quart bottle goes for eight dollars, a one quart bottle must weigh over two pounds.
It's three pounds.
MikeSee? I did that all in my head!
Very good.
MikeThanks.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Dirty Jobs pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.