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S1 E15

Designing Women · Season 1, Episode 15

Carlene, Allison and others in “Unfinished Business”

[Allison starts to enter the storeroom/bathroom... ]

Oh no... (chuckling)... you can't go in there.

Why not?

My cat's using it.

Your cat is using our bathroom?

Yeah, I bought this book that says how you can forever eliminate litter boxes with their offensive odors, and what you do is: you take the litter box and put it on a stack of magazines right by the toilet, and every day you just add more and more magazines to the pile until it's right level with that toilet. And then you take that litter box and put it right on top of the toilet, so the cat gets used to (snap) jumping up there. And finally, you just remove the litter box entirely and just leave the lid up on the toilet, and you know what happens (smiling with her brilliance) ?

Yes. The cat jumps into the toilet. I admit that it's a great gag, and I certainly enjoy playing elaborate practical jokes on household pets as much as anyone but, Carlene, why are you doing this here?

Well, I've got to supervise her progress.

Y'know, I think it's just amazing that you can get a cat to understand the concept of a commode. My dog Brownie, I mean, he just thinks of ours as just a giant punch bowl.

(laughing hysterically) Mary Jo, I can't believe you said that!

Yes I know. Every time I come in here she's a pickin' and you're a grinnin'.

Anthony, where have you been all morning?

Mary Jo, the proper question to ask is 'where have I been all night.' And the answer is... I was locked in the basement of Suzanne's house.

Oh! Were you in the basement? I thought I heard something down there last night.

Oh really? Did it sound something like someone screaming "let me out of here, Bitch!!"?

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