Deep Space Nine · Season 5, Episode 6
“Trials and Tribble-ations” · Season 5, Episode 6
In this episode: Benjamin Sisko (6), Julian Bashir (4), Odo (4), Worf (3), Miles O'Brien (2), Jadzia Dax (1), Dax (1)
Captain, why'd you take the Defiant back in time?
It was an accident.
So you're not contending it was a predestination paradox.
A time loop? That you were meant to go back into the past?
No.
Good.
We hate those. So... what happened?
This may take some time.
Is that a joke?
No.
Good.
We hate those, too.
Don't take it personally, Worf.
I... rather like the way you smell.
Yeah, sort of... earthy, peaty aroma.
With a touch of... lilac.
Be specific, Captain. Which Enterprise? There've been five.
Six.
This was the first Enterprise. Constitution-class.
[Both agents sit back, astonished]
His ship.
James T. Kirk.
[grins] The one and only.
Seventeen separate temporal violations. The biggest file on record.
The man was a menace.
I'm a doctor, not an historian.
In the old days, Operations officers wore red, Command officers wore gold.
And women wore less. [shows off her outfit...which suits her]
I think I'm going to like history.
I had no idea.
What?
He’s so much more handsome in person. Those eyes.
Kirk had quite the reputation as a ladies’ man.
Not him — Spock.
Where did you get that... thing?
From a man named Cyrano Jones. He told me tribbles like everyone. Well, this one doesn't seem to like you.
THE FEELING'S-- [lowers his voice] The feeling's mutual. They are detestable creatures!
Hm... interesting. It's been my observation that most humanoids love soft, furry animals, especially if they make pleasing sounds.
They do nothing but consume food and breed. If you feed that thing more than the smallest morsel, in a few hours you'll have ten tribbles, then a hundred, then a thousand!
Calm down.
They were once considered mortal enemies of the Klingon Empire.
[scoffs] This?! A mortal enemy of the Empire?
They were an ecological menace, a plague to be wiped out.
Wiped out?! What are you saying?!
Hundreds of warriors were sent to track them down throughout the galaxy. An armada obliterated the Tribble homeworld. By the end of the 23rd century, they had been eradicated.
Another glorious chapter of Klingon history. Tell me, do they still sing songs of the Great Tribble Hunt? [chuckles]
[regarding the appearance of 23rd-century Klingons]
Mr. Worf.
They are Klingons. And, it is a long story.
What happened? Genetic engineering?
A viral mutation?
We do not discuss it with outsiders!
Laddie... don't you think you should... rephrase that?
You're right. I should. I didn't mean to say that the Enterprise should be hauling garbage. I meant to say that it should be hauled away as garbage.
[about tribbles] They're born pregnant.
I want these things off the ship. I don't care if it takes every man we've got. I want them off the ship.
You are no hero to the Empire!
I will be. I've been thinking about my statue in the Hall of Warriors. I want it to capture my essence. Our statues can be so generic, don't you think?
I take it whatever your plan is, you've already set it in motion?
I see myself standing with Kirk's head in one hand...and a tribble in the other.
Before we left, I realized there was one last thing I had to do. Something I'd been thinking about ever since I saw that ship on the viewscreen...
[in the past, Sisko hands a tablet to Captain Kirk on the Enterprise Bridge]
Excuse me, Captain. Here's tomorrow's duty roster for your approval.
Lieutenant... Ah, Lieutenant...?
Benjamin Sisko, sir. I've been on temporary assignment here. Before I leave, I just want to say... It's been an honor serving with you, sir.
Alright, Lieutenant, carry on.
Thank you, sir.
[in the present...]
Now... if you want to put a letter of reprimand in my file for that, then go ahead.
(after Dulmer and Lucsly have left) Did you tell them?
They didn't ask. I'm open to suggestions, people.
Dax (lamely): We could build another station...?
(We see Quark, in much the same situation that K-7's bartender was left in, with one tribble perched on his head and hundreds more scattered throughout the bar)
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Deep Space Nine pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
