Let me help you with that.
Whew. Thanks.
No problem. Moving in?:
That's right, yeah- just got here from Iowa. I'm Jennifer, this is Jason.
Chris.
Nice to meet you.
[opens the door as he whispers] Chris! Chris! Don't talk to them! They're evil! Eeeevillll!
Have you met Dan?
Not officially, no. Hi, there! I'm-
[Dan closes the door in front of him]
Well, good luck living next to Dan. And I really mean that.
[Dan opens the door and drags Chris inside his apartment]
What do you think you were doing?
I think I was meeting your neighbors, who seem very nice.
You are so stupid.
You know I really enjoy these little talks of ours, Dan.
Can't you see they're up to something?
Up to something? B-Because-
They're always smiling. And, they insist on saying "Hello" every single time I see them!
Well, I hope you've notified the police.
[angry and flustered] I'll notify them that missing person when your body turns up in-
Let's go. The movie starts soon.
Okay, the coast is clear. Now here's how we roll: Head down, eyes front. Make a beeline for the car. Go! Go! Go! Ahh!
[opens the door] Dan, right? You play basketball? I was thinking about-
Basketball is for communists.
Uh, tennis then?
We baked this pie for you. It's banana cream.
You know, Jennifer also makes the world's best meat pie, if you're interested.
It helps that Jason's a butcher.
[Dan throws the pie away]
Dan!
What? It slipped. Besides, I can't eat dairy.
Oh. Ok. Well. I guess we'll see you soon neighbor.
My car! Look at what they did!
Dan, you were the one who-
NEIGHBORS!!!
More from this episode
More Dan Vs. quotes · These quotes come from Wikiquote's Dan Vs. pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.


