Spencer Reid quotes from Criminal Minds

Reid

Thank you for burning those... Keeping us safe.

Tobias

[as his father] Don't try to trick me.

Reid

I would never try and trick you.

Tobias

You're a liar.

Reid

I'm not a liar.

Tobias

Lying's a sin.

Reid

I'm not a liar.

Tobias

This will be over quickly if you just confess your sins.

Reid

I'm not a sinner.

Tobias

We're all sinners.

Morgan

It's called empathy. And it's a good thing.

Reid

It's not. It's got me all messed up. I don't know how to focus, I can't do my job as well. So, what do I do?

Morgan

You use it. Let it make you a better profiler... a better person.

Reid

A better person.

Reid

[at the homeless shelter] Do you keep a list of everyone who comes through here?

We have a sign-in sheet but we don't force anyone to sign if they don't want to. Some who do don't even use their real names. Elvis eats here a lot.

Morgan

Are you gonna tell me why you missed that flight to Galveston?

Reid

I already told you, there was no cell reception.

Morgan

Right.

Reid

What?

Morgan

Reid, any time you want to come up with a better answer, I'm standing right here.

Reid

Statistically, 94% of all serial arsonists are male, 75% are white and few, if any, are ever caught.

Prentiss

Few? You don't have a percentage?

Reid

16%. Those 16% set 30 plus fires before they're ever apprehended. I'm trying to be more conversational.

Prentiss

Oh. It's not working.

[to Gideon and Reid] Would you like something to eat? This borscht is exquisite. It's my mother's old country recipe.

Reid

Didn't you forsake all your relatives when you swore the Thieves' Code?

I didn't forsake her recipes.

Gideon

Natalya was a part of this.

Morgan

How did I not see this coming?

Reid

How could any of us, man? She sought us out. We were so blinded by the fact that she trusted us, we never considered not trusting her.

Morgan

What was it the Yorkshire Ripper said about his victims?

Reid

The women I killed were filth. Bastard prostitutes that were littering the streets; I was just cleaning up the place a bit.

Morgan

[about the unsub] He's a house cleaner.

Reid

Mission-based killer who believes his murders are helping society.

Hotchner

We're going to provide a psychological profile of the man we're looking for. It contains some unusual, specific personality traits that someone out there is bound to recognize.

Gideon

Which will make him relatively easy to locate. Long-lasting, negative impression he leaves on anyone he might meet.

Morgan

We have a term for the killing behavior this unsub displays: cleaning house. Fixing what's wrong with the world.

Reid

He's deeply rationalized this behavior, and while he certainly knows the killing is wrong, he truly believes that he's doing the world a great service.

Morgan

Ultimately, this type of unsub becomes a loner. There won't be too many people that can still tolerate him. Now, if he does have a relationship at all, the person will not be his equal. It'll be someone subservient to him.

Reid

He'll be... fastidious, tending toward obsessive-compulsive disorder, and he'll have an overwhelming sense of indignation towards the things that he's judged to be wrong. He wouldn't even consider the reasons why someone might disagree with him.

He sounds like a real jagoff.

Morgan

Exactly. Class "A" scumbag.

Prentiss

Detective McGee started noticing the disappearances a year ago. The Unsub probably had a stressor at this time. The death of a family member, or someone who had some semblance of control over him. Right now, no one has control over him.

Reid

It's probable that he isn't currently working after this many victims and the devolution that it brings, a job just wouldn't leave him time to practice his true calling.

Capt. Wright

Which is...?

Hotchner

A predator. A killing machine. By now, it's become all he thinks about.

Reid

It's odd. If the Unsub were out here, he'd stand out. You know, people would recognize the description.

Prentiss

So where does that leave us?

Capt. Wright

Right where I thought we'd were.

Hotchner

Captain?

Capt. Wright

You said this guy would definitely be memorable. You were adamant. So if no one out here remembers him, according to you, he doesn't exist.

J.J

That's not exactly what we said.

Capt. Wright

It's what you implied.

Hotchner

What do you think happened to them, Captain?

Capt. Wright

I told you, I don't think anything happened to them.

Hotchner

Oh, that's right. You think they all got houses and jobs.

Reid

Don't do that!

Morgan

Why not?

Reid

Because there are six elevator related deaths per year, not to mention 10,000 injuries that require hospitalization. Chill out.

Morgan

That sounds like pretty good odds to me. Are you scared, Reid?

Reid

I'm not scared. I don't want to be in an elevator with you, to be honest.

Morgan

How about I push that? What if I push... [the elevator falls a few feet]

Prentiss

So Hotch is even more intense now that Gideon's gone.

Reid

Yeah, I've noticed.

Prentiss

Do you think that's gonna change?

Reid

I certainly think we'll find out.

Prentiss

What about you? You okay?

Reid

Oh, I'm- I'm great.

Prentiss

Do you want to talk about it?

Reid

What's there to talk about, really?

Prentiss

Gideon.

Reid

Oh, no. He, uh- he left a letter explaining everything. Just like my dad did when he abandoned me and my mom.

Prentiss

He addressed it to you.

Reid

Yeah, yeah. You know, Gideon stood toe to toe with some of the... the sickest people on this planet. I think that took a lot of courage, right?

Prentiss

Yeah.

Reid

So, why'd he do this? It's addressed to me, but I'm- I'm not- I'm not the only one that he abandoned.

Prentiss

But why is it addressed to you? I think you need to read that letter again.

Reid

I have an eidetic memory, Emily.

Prentiss

Ah, yeah, I know, and an IQ of 187, but what do you remember about your father?

Reid

What do you mean?

Prentiss

Well, he gave you ten years before he left, and yet you've erased all those memories. And it's too painful, I get it. But then Gideon leaves. I think you need to read that letter again, and ask yourself why, of all the people he walked away from, did he only explain himself to one person: you.

Hotchner

We're looking for two men. Probably white, given the neighborhoods that they hit, mid to late twenties, intelligent, and organized.

Morgan

These are career criminals. One or both has done hard time, but neither presents as a convict. They would appear clean-shaven, well dressed...

Prentiss

Neighborly. This helps them talk their way into the homes. They may also be using a ruse.

What kind of ruse?

Hotchner

Given that the invasions have taken place in the evening, it could be anything. Could be door to door sales, person in distress, car trouble.

Reid

Uh, Derrick Todd Lee used a tape of a baby crying to get women to open their doors in Baton Rouge. Never underestimate their creativity.

Prentiss

These men share a very tight bond, and a mutual compulsion to kill, but their signatures reveal two very distinct personalities.

Hotchner

One brutalizes the parents. This is the dominant one. Sadistic, remorseless, extremely volatile.

Prentiss

The other prefers a needle. His injections are consistent with an angel of death. He's more withdrawn, sensitive, and he has a warped sense of mercy.

Realistically, it'll take at least three hours to cover this place.

Morgan

Realistically, we have less than half that time.

How do you figure?

Reid

99 percent of abducted children were killed or died within the first 24 hours, 75 percent within the first three hours, and like, of course you know, Jessica Davis, 44 percent of children were abducted and killed in the first hour.

Reid

I'm with the FBI.

FBI? You're not serious. You look like a pipe-cleaner with eyes. I could snap you like a twig.