Criminal Minds quotes

How about Andrew, it's Greek for valiant.

Let's call him... Sergio.

Haley

Ha ha. Please tell me you're kidding

Hotch

Butch.

Haley

How about Donald?

Hotch

Hans.

Haley

No! Wait, wait. Um... okay. Gideon.

Hotch

Not a chance.

Haley

It's Hebrew. Look what it means. It's perfect. Gideon Hotchner.

Hotch

No.

Haley

Yes

Hotch

No.

Haley

Yes.

Hotch

No.

Haley

Gideon.

Gideon

Anyone recognize these faces?

Victims of the Footpath Killer.

Gideon

That's what Virginia newspapers are calling him. We refer to him as the Unknown Subject or Unsub. I told Virginia P.D. they're looking for a white male in his twenties, who owns an American made truck in disrepair. Works a menial job. I told 'em, when you find him, don't be surprised if he speaks with a severe stutter.

Not to sound skeptical, but come on... a stutter?

Gideon

Where'd the murders occur? Hiking paths. Isolated. If I'm a killer who has to use an immediate application of overpowering force, even out in the middle of nowhere, I lack confidence. I can't charm them into my car like Ted Bundy did. I can't because I am ashamed of something.

Gideon

Joseph Conrad said, "The belief in a supernatural source of evil is not necessary. Men alone are quite capable of every wickedness."

Hotch

This is Special Agent Gideon, Special Agent Morgan, our expert on obsessional crimes, Special agent Reid.

Gideon

Dr. Reid.

Hotch

Dr. Reid, our expert on, well, everything.

[dog barks at Reid] Sandy! No, no, no, no! I'm so sorry.

Hotch

It's okay. It's what we call 'The Reid Effect'. Happens with children too.

Hotch

I'm Agent Hotchner, this is Special Agent Doctor Reid.

You look too young to have gotten into medical school.

Reid

They're PhD's. Three of them.

Are you a genius or something?

Reid

I don't believe that intelligence can be accurately quantified, but I do have an I.Q. of 187, an eidetic memory and can read 20,000 words per minute. [off David's look] Yes, I'm a genius.

Morgan

Reid, are you good with this? We've got a woman who's only got a few hours left to live, an incomplete profile and a Unit Chief on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

Gideon

[Gideon comes in from behind him] They don't call them nervous breakdowns anymore.

Reid

It's called a "Major Depressive Episode."

Morgan

I know, Reid.

Gideon

The unidentified subject is white, in his late twenties. He's someone you wouldn't notice at first, he's someone who'd blend into any crowd. Violent nature of the crime suggests previous criminal record, petty crimes, maybe auto theft. We've classified him as an organised killer, careful, psychopath as opposed to psychotic. He follows the news, has good hygiene, he's smart. Because he's smart, the only physical evidence you'll find is what he wants you to find. He's mobile, car in good condition. Our guess, Jeep Cherokee, tinted windows. Murders all involve rapes, but rape without penetration is a form of piquerism, and that tells us that he is sexually inadequate. Psychiatric evaluations will show a history of paranoia, stemming from a childhood trauma, death of a parent or family member. And now he feels persecuted and watched. Murder gives him a sense of power. Organised killers have a fascination with law enforcement, they will inject themselves into the investigation. They will even come forward as witnesses, to see just how much the police really know. That makes him feel powerful, in control. Which is why I also think, in fact I know, you have already interviewed him.

Gideon

Emerson said, "All is riddle, and the key to a riddle is another riddle."

Gideon

"Try again. Fail again. Fail better."

Reid

Samuel Beckett.

Morgan

"Try not. Do or do not."

Reid

Yoda.

Gideon

"The farther backward you can look, the farther forward you will see." Winston Churchill [NOTE: The actual quotation by Churchill was, "The longer you can look back, the farther you can look forward." The attribution of the mistaken form of the quote dates from at least 1959.]

Garcia

You've reached Penelope Garcia in the FBI's Office of Supreme Genius.

Morgan

Hey it's Morgan. Need you to work me some magic here. I got a program called Deadbolt Defense and a girl with only a couple hours to live. So what do you know?

Garcia

Then you got a problem. Deadbolt's the number one password crack resistant software out there. You're going to have to get inside this guy's head to get the password.

Morgan

I thought I was calling the Office of Supreme Genius.

Garcia

Well, gorgeous, you've been rerouted to the Office of Too Friggin' Bad.

Reid

Do you know why he [Gideon] always introduces me as Dr. Reid?

Hotch

Because he knows that people see you as a kid and he wants to make sure that they respect you.

Morgan

Alright, I'm an insomniac who listens to Metallica to go to sleep at night. What song could possibly speak to me?

Reid

Enter Sandman.

Hotch

Do you know how salesmen get us to buy a car? They call it reciprocity. They drop the price and it feels like they've done us a favor. We feel obligated. There's a sudden pressure to reciprocate this one little favor. And it's so powerful that we'll... put a deposit down on a car that we're not even sure we really want.

So what?

Hotch

So Vogel did you a favor. He protected you in prison, and now you feel like you owe him and you need to protect him. Guys like Vogel learn in the schoolyard which kids to bully and which kids to protect, and he's got you convinced that you owe him so much that you'll go to jail for him. Richard, I'm here to remind you of something. You owe him nothing.