[to Charlie] It's all right. It's all right, baby boy. Tonight we drink. Tomorrow you start making some phone calls. An opportunity will present itself. If not, we can always stuff our pockets full with rocks and walk hand-in-hand into the Pacific.
Just don't come off as one of those snotty, pretentious fucks who looks down on television.
How is it? [points to a script in Hanks hand]
To be honest, it's like a colonoscopy of the mind.
But if he asks, I will tell him it's "totes buckskin brill."
I have squandered a lot of opportunities, it's true. I could give you a bunch of excuses. I could blame it on my masturbating agent or I could chalk it up to fear and self-loathing in Los Angeles, but the truth is that... I'm trying to grow the fuck up for once. You know, I'm on a quest to reclaim the best parts of myself before it's too buckskin late.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Californication pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.