Peralta, it's no coincidence you're on this ship. You won a free cruise without entering a contest; how do you think that happened?
I don't know. Maybe it's because I bought Speed 2 on DVD and the internet figured out that cruises are one of my interests!
Great film. Sandy B. in a sarong. [He and Jake bump fists] But the tics are all me. I brought you here because I'm in peril.
Pfft. Peril.
Don't "Pfft" my peril!
Pfft.
Somebody's tryin' to kill me, and I need protection. So I sent for my best friend.
I am not your best friend. I'm your worst enemy! Get that through your head!
[To Amy] It's this kind of bickering that makes us such an adorable couple.
Whatever, Judy! You're under arrest!
You can't arrest me, boo! We're in international waters. Which is why I can smoke as much weed as I want. Welcome, to the high seas.
No. No way that that's true. Amy, tell me I can arrest him right now.
Judy's right, we have no jurisdiction. Technically this boat flies under the flag of Uzbekistan.
Uh-oh! Your girl knows about the Uzbeks!
But the captain can have him arrested; he has total authority on this boat.
Perfect; captains love me. Just wait until he or she finds out they're employing a criminal.
[Cut to the three of them standing out on deck with the captain.]
Yeah, about forty percent of the crew are criminals.
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