Jake, Boyle and others in “Unfinished Business”

Jake

I swear, these perps are so stupid. I'd make a better criminal than any of 'em.

Boyle

Yeah, you would! And everyone would call you "The Handsome Bandit".

Jake

Thank you, Charles. And the best part is, none of you could catch me.

Terry

Oh, come on.

Holt

I'm fairly certain you would be caught. No, scratch that. I'm 100% sure you'd be caught.

Jake

Ho-ho-ho! All right, challenge accepted.

Holt

I didn't issue a challenge.

Jake

Fine, I'll issue it for you. What's the most valuable thing in your office?

Holt

My Medal of Valor.

Jake

God, you are such a hero. All right, how about this; I bet you that by midnight tonight, I can steal the Medal of Valor from your office.

Holt

Why would I possibly agree to that?

Jake

Because if I lose, I'll work the next five weekends. No overtime. And I won't tell anyone here about the time I saw you wearing short-shorts outside of work. But if I win-

Holt

You won't.

Jake

-you have to do all of my paperwork tonight, the busiest and spookiest night of the year. And you have to publicly state that I am an amazing detective/genius.

Holt

And this won't interfere with you doing your job?

Jake

You mean my job as an amazing detective/genius? No, it will not. I will do all of my work, guaranteed.

Holt

I'm considering it. I'm interested. I agree to participate.

Jake

All right, there's the robot I fell in love with.