It wasn't really 70 minutes, not to him. When he was first ingested, I tweaked the time preferences, made it seem like five years from his perspective. Some might say that five years with me is punishment enough.
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
Listen, it's easier if you just comply.
[Regarding Joe's cookie]
FFenn
Just changed the time settings. Cranked him up to a thousand years a minute - there's a proper sentence. Or do you want me to switch him off?
HHolder
[after a moment's thought] No. Leave him on for Christmas.
RRyan
There's sugary and then there's fucking diabetes!
SSusan
It turned out a lot of my friends didn't care for honesty. Treated me like I had taken a shit at their breakfast table. But Jesus Christ, it felt good.
[Recounting her past friendship with Naomi at the wedding]
LLacie
We met when we were five years old, and right up through to our teenage years, we made... quite the pair. We, we'd talk about all the things girls talk about. You know, boys, hair, products, uh... more boys. [laughs] I mean, I tried sometimes to expand our range a little and talk about climate change, but she found that kind of boring, so... She was probably right. I mean, fuck the planet, right?
[The guests gasp, but one woman laughs]
WWoman
Whoo!
LLacie
Yes, thank you! Come on. Let's have a little fun here! You know, fuck the planet! [laughs again, then yells into the microphone in a burst of anger] FUCK THE PLANET!
[The guests cringe from the feedback]
[While realizing that without their eye implants, they can both speak without fear of being rated]
LLacie
The fuck are you looking at?
MIMan in Jail
Just what I was wondering.
LLacie
Well... don't!
MIMan in Jail
Don't? Don't wonder?
LLacie
Uh-huh!
MIMan in Jail
It'd be a dull world without wondering.
LLacie
I don't give a shit about your world!
MIMan in Jail
I don't like your brassiere.
LLacie
I don't like your moustache.
MIMan in Jail
I don't like your aura.
LLacie
My aura?
MIMan in Jail
Yeah.
LLacie
I don't like your... head. Your entire head is just ridiculous to me.
MIMan in Jail
Really?
LLacie
You look like an alcoholic former weatherman.
MIMan in Jail
You sound like a lost little lamb that just got told there's no Santa Claus!
LLacie
What sort of cartoon character did your mom have to fuck to brew you up in the womb?
MIMan in Jail
At least I look like I was born, not shit out by some... tormented cow creature in an underground lab!
LLacie
You got tossed out of that lab.
MIMan in Jail
Oh yeah?
LLacie
Oh yeah, flushed out!
MIMan in Jail
Ooooh!
LLacie
[starting to laugh] In the trash! Your face is a fucking...
MIMan in Jail
"Fucking"...?
LLacie
A fucking... biological car crash that'd make Picasso screw up his eyes and say, "Well, that just don't make sense!"
MIMan in Jail
[laughing] You're a fucking asshole!
LLacie
Fuck you!
MIMan in Jail
Fuck you next Wednesday!
LLacie
Fuck you for Christmas!
BBoth
Fuuuuuuuuck youuuuuuuuuu!
You are a top bird. I don't know what that means, but I heard someone say it once and you're it.
What we're working on is an interactive augmented reality system.
Like VR?
More like layers on top of reality.
Oh. Okay, um...
[Katie secures Cooper into a high-tech chair and takes out a device to be implanted in his neck]
Um... what's that?
We call this a mushroom.
Like Mario Brothers?
If you like.
You're qualified to do this, right?
I haven't killed anyone yet. May I?
SSShou Saito
I've always liked to make the player jump. Frightened. You get scared, you jump. Afterwards, you feel good. Why?
Uh, um, because of the adrenaline rush?
SSShou Saito
Yes. But mostly because you are still alive. You have faced your greatest fears in a safe environment. It is a release of fear. It liberates you.
Yeah. I mean, totally.
SSShou Saito
What we are working on now is the most personal survival horror game in history.
[laughs] Cool.
SSShou Saito
One that works out how to scare you by using your own mind.
Whoa! That... that sounds crazy. Can't wait!
I'm uploading a neural net package.
[still amused] "Neural net packing". "Neuronet". Hmm... Name could use a little work, I think, it's all 90s. I'm just kidding, it's a good name.
It's state of the art intelligence software. It learns and adapts on the fly. It'll monitor your brain activity and try and work out how best to frighten you, and then adjust to your experience accordingly.
Whoa!
SSShou Saito
Are you ready?
Oh yeah. Beam me up! Here we go, lock and load.
[over the earpiece] You're being discursive.
What is "discursive"? "Discursive"...
Talkative.
Mm-hmm.
Rambling.
[laughs] Is that a problem?
People sometimes talk more when they're afraid. Helps compensate for the fear. Masks it, too.
Oh yeah?
Similar to when you've got the TV on late at night. The voices make you feel less alone. Even though you are alone.
[laughing, amused] You aren't scaring me, Kate!
Pity.
[Saito and Katie discuss Cooper's death, both speaking Japanese]
SSShou Saito
What happened?
His phone rang.
SSShou Saito
You didn't take it off him?
Yes, but--
SSShou Saito
The signals interfere.
I know I switched it off. Maybe he did something while I was out of the room. An oversight. Won't happen again.
SSShou Saito
The incoming signal must have interfered with the upload sequence.
[sighs in dismay] Every synapse in his brain lit up at once. Then went dead. Like that.
SSShou Saito
You said he shouted something. What was it?
"Mom."
SSShou Saito
[after a moment's thought] Make a note of that.
Yes.
HHector
This gets out, I will lose my kids. And I swear to God, I will stand in a kitchen and put a fucking breadknife through my throat if that happens!
KKenny
[in a broken voice] I only... I only looked at pictures, and--
HHector
And beat one off on camera? That's what they got, yeah? Your hot little face, blurred fist, dick burping fucking spunk everywhere? Your mom's gonna love that on Facebook, Twitter, Insta-fucking-whatever. And her friends. All eyes on you, givin' it that... [makes masturbation gesture] Toss in the cunts at work calling you Spurty McGoo, laughing at your cum-face, making it their desktop wallpaper. It's not just weeks, we're talking years here - when pictures hang about on Google like a Gypsy fucking curse. There's no cure for the Internet, it would never go away. It would be glued to your name, a fucking stain on you! I'd hang myself if that was me. Crack my fucking neck at the first opportunity.
HHector
Hey, listen, Kenny. Look, I'm sorry about... just back there. Shouting at you. Calling you stuff. I'm an all-right bloke, really. I swear, I am, when it's... when stuff's normal.
[Kenny meets a man in the forest to fight to the death, as instructed, under threat of his secret being leaked to the public. A video drone hovers above them, recording the scene]
MIMan in Forest
I don't know about you, but... my life's over if this gets out. Fucking over! What'd they get you for?
KKenny
[whimpering] I just looked at some photos, that's all! I just looked at... one or two photos!
MIMan in Forest
Yeah, you know, I just looked at pictures, too.
[Kenny starts shaking his head frantically]
MIMan in Forest
How young were they, in the pictures? How young?
[Kenny pants and sobs, unable or unwilling to respond]
MIMan in Forest
Yeah? Well, me too.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Black Mirror pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.