Butt-head: Who are these guys?
Beavis: Um...I think it's the Village People.
Butt-head: Uh...oh yeah.
Beavis: Well I'll be hornswoggled and dipped in turds!

Butt-head: Who's this fartknocker?
Beavis: Yeah, yeah. What's wrong with him?
Butt-head: He should like, go to the doctor, and say: "Doctor, I suck! You've gotta help me!"
Beavis: Yeah, heh, that would be cool.
Butt-head: AUGH! It's that dude!
Beavis: Yeah, yeah, it's that Boy chick.

Butt-head: Who's this?
Beavis: Yeah!
Butt-head: What's this buttmunch doing on a stage?

Butt-head: Whoa! Are these video games?
Beavis: Cool! Me first! Me first!

Butt-head: Whoa! Check it out. That's the biggest tire I ever saw.

Butt-head: Whoa! Check out his unit!
Beavis: Whoa, this chick is flat!
Butt-head: Beavis, you see that unit?
Beavis: Yeah, yeah.
Butt-head: That means it's not a chick.
Beavis: Oh, oh yeah. I wasn't looking.

Butt-head: Whoa! Did you see that? He had a band-aid on one of his boobs.
Beavis: Really? Why?
Butt-head: Maybe he's like, trying to shave the hair off of his chest, and--
Beavis: OW! Don't say stuff like that, Butt-head.
Butt-head: Why not, Beavis? It's like he shaved his nipple off.
Beavis: OW! OW! Stop it!

Butt-head: Whoa! He's just like, walking around in his underwear!
Beavis: Yeah, yeah and he's having popcorn for breakfast, that's pretty cool!

Butt-head: Whoa! Her butt looks better in pants than most chicks butts look naked.
Beavis: [quickly] Her butt looks better in pants than most chicks butts look naked. Her butt looks better in pants than most chicks butts look naked. Her butt looks better in pants than most chicks butts look naked.
Built to Spill, In the Morning

Butt-head: Whoa! I've never seen a puppet with hooters like that.
Beavis: Those are some big boobs.
Butt-head: They probably have this chick on the show to teach kids the number 2.
Beavis: I'd say this puppet chick right here is one of the top three muppets that I would do.
Butt-head: Really? Who else would you do, Beavis?
Beavis: Well, Miss Piggy's kinda hot.
Butt-head: That fat pig?
Beavis: Shut up, Butt-head! I like 'em with a little meat on their bones.
Dire Straits, Walk of Life

Butt-head: Whoa! Is this the Black Crowes?
Beavis: Yeah!
Butt-head: Wait a minute, this isn't Black Crowes. This is cool.
Beavis: Yeah, yeah! These guys are cool!

Butt-head: Whoa! Is this The Partridge Family?
Beavis: Um...yeah!
Butt-head: I think this is Barry Manilow.
Beavis: This isn't Barry Manilow. He's blonde haired like me.
Butt-head: Yeah, and he sucks like you too.
Beavis: Yeah. I mean, no. Buttmunch.

Butt-head: Whoa! It's Barbie.
Beavis: They oughta get some dude without a wiener to play Ken.
Butt-head: Why don't you go for it, Beavis?

Butt-head: Whoa! She's got a small, furry animal in her mouth.
Beavis: Yeah. Yeah. That's cool.
Butt-head: This chick was married to that dude who would punch you if you took his picture.
Beavis: Yeah...that Woody Allen dude.
Butt-head: No, assmunch! Woody Allen's the dude who went out with his daughter.
Beavis: Oh yeah. Hey Butt-head, if you were a chick, would you like, go out with your stepdad?
Butt-head: Uh...not if his name was Woody.
Beavis: Yeah. What if his name was Stiffy?
Butt-head: Uh...well...maybe. Stiffy Allen. Whoa! She's almost naked! That gives me a special feeling on my Woody Allen.
Madonna, Secret

Butt-head: Whoa! She's one of those grubby girls.
Beavis: Yeah, yeah!
Butt-head: She wants me.
Beavis: Me too.