(as Frylock gives money during an offering in Church) Where'd you get money?
I worked for it. And I'm giving it to the church, because you need to experience how it feels to give, and not just receive, like you usually do!
But also, how it feels to receive too. 'Cause that's a good feeling too y'all. When Santa Clause comes down from the cross, and give me all that stuff I asked for.
(sighs; as Meatwad called a statue of Jesus Christ's crucifixion Santa) That ain't Santa Clause, okay? How many times do I gotta tell you that?
Well he got a beard. And that ain't a belly full of jelly. Look like he got an appendectomy scar. Is this the mall? 'Cause I'm sitting here wondering how I gonna sit on his lap when he's hanging from some nails.
(angry) Santa Claus did NOT die for our sins!!
Santa Claus is dead?! No!!
Yes. He crashed his sleigh, right into a wall...'cause he was drinking a lot...
What?
It was a twisted fiery wreckage...of sleigh, reindeer bones, and the old fat bastard's guts.
(leaving) Excuse me, folks we need to go. (drags Master Shake with him)
And who's drunk enough to get nailed to wood?! I can see maybe one nail! But then you'd think he'd move! But NOOOO. We gotta revere him for his slow reaction time?!
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