Let's try, I'll go first... Living or dead?
Archie: I was driving a cab, Edith, not a hearse. Go back to your Solitaire, huh.
Gloria: Give us a hint. Is he in show business?
Archie: Bingo. I'll give you another hint. Bongo, bongo, bongo.
Mike: Well, he's either Desi Arnaz, or knowing you, he's probably black.
Archie: Right. Black as the ace of spades. In fact, as far as I'm concerned, this guy IS the ace of spades.
Edith: For goodness sakes. Archie, you just said ace of spades and I turned up the ace of spades. You see that in the movies and you say that wouldn't happen in real life, but here we are in real life and it happened.
Archie: We're in real life over here, Edith, would you care to join us?
Gloria: Was it Flip Wilson?
Archie: No, no, no, no.
Mike: Belafonte?
Archie: No, I said black, Meathead. Harvey Belafonte ain't black. He's just a good looking white guy dipped in carmel (sic).
Can you maybe give us a little preview of one of the songs you're gonna do?
Gloria: Oh, daddy. Mr. Davis makes his living entertaining. You're asking him to go to work.
Mike: Yeah, Arch. How'd you like to be a guest in somebody's house, and they say, "C'mon Arch, do some packing and lifting for us"?
I think that if God had meant us to be together, He'd have put us together. But look what He done. He put you over in Africa, and He put the rest of us in all the white countries.
Sammy Davis Jr.: Well, you must have told him where we were, 'cause somebody came and got us.
I'm sorry Mr. Davis. Sometimes my father says the wrong things.
Sammy: Yes, I've noticed that.
Lionel: But he's not a bad guy. I mean, he'd never burn a cross on your lawn.
Sammy: Yeah, but if he saw one burning he's liable to toast a marshmallow on it!
SSammy
(to Archie) And if you were prejudiced, you'd walk around thinking you're better than anybody else in the world. But I can honestly say, having spent these marvelous moments with you... You ain't better than anybody.
Archie: Can I have your hand on that, Sammy?
