[as water pours from the ceiling] The ceiling appears to be leaking.
CCooter
No, it's not. We looked into it and it's not.
“Cooter” · Season 2, Episode 15
In this episode: Jack Donaghy (3), Liz Lemon (2)
RCRandom Congressman at meeting
I can't support that. Dam is a swear word. I'd support it if instead of dam we called it a "god finger".
(looking at her calendar) Ugh... why don't I cross out the days like people in the movies?
Cooter!
CCooter
That's not my name. My name is James Riley. Cooter Burger? What do you think I am, a cartoon dog? The president named me that!
He gave you two nicknames?
CCooter
"Cooter" because I look like a turtle, and "Burger" because he saw me eating a hamburger one time! We have to get out of here.
Now that's the spirit. But if they're not taking resignations, there's only one way out: we have to work together to get fired.
CCooter
It wasn't even a hamburger... it was a sandwich.
It was the cheese curls.
Pardon?
Causing the false positives on my home pregnancy tests. Apparently, Sabor de Soledad gets its special tangy flavor from evaporated bull semen.
That explains your hair's thickness and shine.
Apparently, in Mexico women use it to stop their periods before Cinco de Mayo.
I'm a little afraid to ask if you're still eating them.
(dejectedly) They're so good.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's 30 Rock pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.