Sir Arnold and Sir Humphrey in “Christmas Special (1984): Party Games”

Sir Arnold

So, will our next Prime Minister be our eminent Chancellor or our distinguished Foreign Secretary?

Sir Humphrey

That's what I wanted to ask you, which do you think it should be?

Sir Arnold

Hmmm. Difficult, like asking which lunatic should run the asylum.

Sir Arnold

Have we any allies?

Sir Humphrey

Oh, quite a few yes; the Chief Whip, particularly. But he's worried that whichever gets the job will antagonise the other's supporters and split the party.

Sir Arnold

So we're looking for a compromise candidate.

Sir Humphrey

Hmm. Malleable.

Sir Arnold

Flexible.

Sir Humphrey

Likeable.

Sir Arnold

No firm opinions.

Sir Humphrey

No bright ideas.

Sir Arnold

Not intellectually committed.

Sir Humphrey

Without the strength of purpose to change anything.

Sir Arnold

Someone who you know can be manipula— professionally guided.

Sir Humphrey

And leave the business of government in the hands of the experts.