Neal Caffrey quotes from White Collar

Neal

You want me to pull the records? We have clerks for that.

Peter

I have something better. I have you.

Shame the Greeks destroyed it.

Neal

Shame you didn't have a better history teacher.

Peter

Have you ever met a woman who didn't—

Neal

Brittney. Brittney Nicole. Second grade... I had a gap in my teeth.

Peter

This had better be good.

Neal

I took the painting.

Peter

Damnit Neal .

Neal

I wasn't gonna... [Peter holds up his hand] I did it for... [Peter stops him again] We can use it to catch Dorsette, he doesn't know I work for you.

Peter

We'll set it up tomorrow. Now get the hell out of my house.

Neal

[leaving] Goodnight, Elizabeth.

Elizabeth

Goodnight, Neal. [walks over to Peter] Well, he told you the truth about the painting.

Peter

Because they threatened Taryn.

Elizabeth

It's a start.

Peter

Yeah, it's a start.

Neal

I think I just saw the Ark of the Covenant back there.

Peter

If my face melts, let me know.

Neal

I never lied to Peter.

Elizabeth

You did leave a few things out.

Neal

You don't understand; I have to find Kate.

Elizabeth

My husband desperately wants to trust you and you keep giving him reasons not to. You're on your own on this one, Neal.

Neal

No, wait, please don't go. [Elle stands up and leaves]

Neal

[to Peter] Now what?

Peter

Now I wouldn't take you off this case if I could.

Neal

[about his mugshot] I never liked this picture.

Peter

It's not that bad.

Neal

It's better than my driver's license.

Peter

Which one? You have several. [Neal looks at him] Okay, one crime at a time.

Mozzie

I'm the bishop in case you were wondering.

Neal

I wasn't.

Mozzie

Oh.

Mozzie

Okay. So. Fowler wants the music box, let's give it to him. Where is it?

Neal

I don't have it.

Mozzie

What? You told everyone you had it.

Neal

I never told anyone. Everyone assumed I took it and I never corrected them.

Mozzie

It did make you appear... superhuman.

Neal

Image is everything.

Neal

Aw, you're not comfortable around the six year old.

Peter

I don't speak their language.

Neal

I do?

Peter

Yeah, you do. Come on, Peter Pan.

Peter

How did you do that?

Neal

Well, your hand is programmed over years to write letters a certain way. Try to mimic someone else's, and your style will always creep in. But, turn the signature upside down and it becomes nothing more than a drawing, all you have to do is copy the lines. The preconceptions about letters go away and you have a perfect signature.

Peter

That's a neat trick. Don't ever copy mine again.

Neal

Never again.

Peter

You have copied my signature.

Neal

Let's... focus on the crime at hand.

Peter

She's taking advantage of the system.

Neal

I hate when people take advantage of the system. Now... that I work for the system, of course.

Elizabeth

[Moz is sweeping the Burke's house for bugs] So, um, you sure he won't try anything?

Neal

Do you have any rare paintings or coins?

Elizabeth

No.

Neal

Then you'll be okay.

Mozzie

[offscreen] Is this Gorham silverware? It's rather unique.

Neal

Maybe you should keep an eye on him.

Elizabeth

Yeah.

Mozzie

A New Yorker who does not take the subway is not a New Yorker you can trust.

Neal

I don't take the subway.

Mozzie

Precisely.

Neal

Out of all the people in my life—Mozzie, even Kate, you know—you're the only one.

Peter

"The only one" what?

Neal

The only person in my life I trust.