How stupid are you, you motherfucking snake? I know all about your meeting with Marwood and Purcell; I know all about how you're trying to fuck me with that abstinence program of yours. Underneath this whole honorable, decent, wholesome, boy scout crap of yours, I know exactly who you are.
Oh, you do.
Yes, I do.
Oh, so I don't have to explain that I am not someone who would piss away my presidency on a bunch of half-assed decisions...
What?
...and, by the way, by messing around with that pretty-boy Charlie Baird, for God's sake!
What? Charlie Baird? What does Charlie Baird have to do with any of this?
I...I don't know, he's got nothing to do with it. What is he...
You're such a liar! You're such a liar! Why did you even join my ticket in the first place?
Because I happen to believe in something called public service.
Oh, bullshit!
Okay, well then, I've got no...
I'll tell you why! Because you wanted to be a step closer to the presidency and to me. You wanted it so bad, you could taste it.
This is unbelievable. Please...
You are lying now just like you lied back then, just like you lied about that night in the cab with the green shoes!
Oh...well, now I got no idea what you're talking about.
You know exactly what I'm talking about. You remembered the green shoes that night, but not the fact that you wanted to fuck me? Come on. Come on! No straight man remembers a woman's shoes.
Well, you got me. I'm gay. So...
Just admit it! Just say the truth for once in your life. Come on, Tom. You wanted to fuck me that night, just say it!
Will you stop it?!
Just say you wanted to fuck my brains out!
Alright, I wanted to fuck your brains out!
There you go. And now you're trying to fuck me tonight!
No, I am fucking you tonight!
No, I'm gonna fuck you!
[After an awkward pause, they passionately kiss]
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All quotes from this episode →More Veep quotes · These quotes come from Wikiquote's Veep pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.


