Richard, James and others in “July 10th, 2005”

And the big news this week is Jeremy has been banned from driving for six months. Yes he has! [Audience cheers and applauds] I know! What do we do?

I'm really sorry to disappoint you, but I have to point out that it wasn't his local magistrate that banned him, it was his doctor!

It was and that's why it's taking him so long to get to the stage! [Jeremy slowly approaches the stage] Ooh, you look like you're in pain.

Yes, I am. I have a top speed of one.

What have you done?

I slipped two discs in my back and they told me not to drive or write. Thank you so much for that! That's kind of what I do!