[During the opening sequence.]
Tonight: Noble's difficult third album comes to our track; the art of being a white van man; and the Suzuki Liana is back with some bloke called Jenson Button!
Top Gear · Season 8, Episode 8
“July 30th, 2006” · Season 8, Episode 8
In this episode: Jeremy Clarkson (12), Richard Hammond (7), James May (1)
[During the opening sequence.]
Tonight: Noble's difficult third album comes to our track; the art of being a white van man; and the Suzuki Liana is back with some bloke called Jenson Button!
And, then, inside, it's the usual blend of dead animal and rainforest, but with a twist!
[Richard and James are talking about the Rolls-Royce 101EX's ceiling, which has lots of little lights on that look like stars]
[from across the studio] That is DISGUSTING!
Oh, dear! I fear Jeremy may be heading this way with an opinion!
[on the 101EX's "bling" features, like the aforementioned pinlight headliner, the glass Spirit of Ecstasy, and the carbon fiber body details]
This, if they ever put it into production, and if it has all this stuff on it, will have to be called the Rolls-Royce Vulgarsonic.
[To Richard] I've just had a really good idea! Why don't you shut up? And why don't you tell the all the ladies and gentlemen, with your Tippex teeth, about the car that you've been driving that I haven't.
Now, the previous Noble, the M12, was a real "wham, bam, thank you ma'am" punch in the back.
If I was in a TVR, now, the indicators would be on the ceiling and the switches would be made of kryptonite and the doors would open inwards on a dodecahedral hinge. But no! If I pull up in a Noble, the door is just a door, that opens sort of... doorishly!
[on the Stig]
Some say that his first name really is "The," and that if he went on Celebrity Love Island, they'd all be pregnant, including the camera men. All we know is, he's called the Stig.
I like to enjoy myself as we all do.
[interrupting] So you get a lot of sex.
Probably more than you, Jeremy, yes.
Next up, James Kray.
Richard really did have a size problem, and his van was pretty small as well.
[upon seeing the size of the van James had bought] James, are you filming with us today or are you moving house?
Who's got the fastest van?
I'm no match for Hamster; look at his postage stamp go!
[voiceover] James was having problems with his illegal immigrant. So, he decided to employ him.
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