Doctor, Hero formerly known as Wonderboy and others in “Unfinished Business”

I think a good way to begin is to tell Rusty a bit about yourselves and your journey to the group.

Me first? Well, I have a bit of an eating disorder...

No!

Lance, wait your turn.

As a superhero sidekick, I led a very active, athletic lifestyle. But when I turned eighteen, and I was, shall we say, "replaced with a newer model," I started putting the weight on. And then I would eat more because I was depressed. (The Doctor prompts him to continue.) And...I have abandonment issues? More?

Tell Rusty your name.

Oh, well, that's a tricky one! The latest development in my caped crusade against Captain Sunshine's lawyers is that I get to keep most of the costume, but I'm no longer allowed to call myself Wonderboy when I appear in public.

Lance...

Our turn? Lance Hale, one half of the world-famous Hale Brothers. Boy detectives. You've heard of us. Anyway, we're here because my allegedly twin brother Dale still hasn't gotten over our father's death.

I can still see his face through the steam of his pooling blood as he lay sputtering on the cold linoleum floor...

(punches Dale in the arm) Punch-buggy depressing! Nobody wants to hear that crap, Dale! Heheh, sorry. We didn't just lose our dad that night. His death remains our only unsolved case ever. We had to quit the business because the shame was just too great.

Action Johnny

Yeah, retiring at thirty on daddy's famous fortune must've been real hard on you...

For your information, Action Junkie, he bequeathed most of it to the local boy detective academy. We hardly got dick because nothing we ever did was good enough!

He did leave us that nice car...

It's totally fuckin' cherry! But that is not the point, Dale, and don't interrupt me again, or I swear to God I will fuck you up...