Harvey Denton quotes from The League of Gentlemen

Perhaps you're a naturally slothful person, sluggish and indolent. A dawdling flaneur, content to waste his life spread-eagled on pillow, forever indulging himself in the pleasures of the palm.

In this house, we wage a constant battle against the microbe and germ.

Oh dear. It seems Benjamin thinks there’s something odd in drinking one’s own pee wee. Something unnatural?

Yes, I do!

Well there are plenty of precedents in the animal kingdom that demonstrate otherwise. [hands Benjamin an empty glass] My toads, for example, will consume almost three times their own volume in urine every day. [urinates into the glass] Perhaps you would mock the toad in his wisdom! What is good enough for him is not so for you?! Father Toad has been on this Earth since the dawn of time, millions of years before man saw fit to scratch out the back of their latrines…and I daresay he and his amphibian brethren will outlast our own petty species…so join me then and drink, DRINK! So we may become more like him and his batrachian friends!

Hi, I've got a frog for a Mr. Denton.

A what?

A...frog.

How dare you, sir! In this house, we do not use the F word! This...is a toad!

What goes from green to red at the flick of a switch?

Why, a frog in a liquidiser!

Wrong! A toad! [flicks on the liquidiser with a toad inside]