A character in The Berenstain Bears
Played by Nancy Cartwright
The Berenstain Bears · 34 quotes
Most-quoted character in The Berenstain Bears: in 24 of its 34 quotes
Most scenes with: Mama Bear (15), Papa Q. Bear (14)
Do we have them, Papa?
Do we have what?
Annual rings.
[laughing] No, my dear. We have something better: birthdays and birthday parties. And it seems to me that you're going to be having a birthday pretty soon.
A party? Am I going to have a birthday party? [dancing excitedly] A real birthday party with all the trimmings?
I don't see why not.
[as Sister pins the tail on the donkey just right] Terrific! Way to go! Yay, Sister!
[removing the blindfold] Oh goody, I won, I won!
[presenting one of Sister's friends with a prize] Good work, sonny. Here's your prize!
But Mama, I won fair and square!
Of course you won, sweetie, but you can't get the prize because it's your birthday. It wouldn't be polite.
[Papa Bear, Mama Bear, Brother Bear, and Sister's friends sing "Happy Birthday Sister Bear". It is sung to the tune of London Bridge.]
[singing] ♪ Happy birthday, Sister Bear, ♪
♪ Sister Bear, Sister Bear. ♪
♪ Happy birthday, Sister Bear. ♪
♪ We all love you! ♪
[But after Papa, Brother and Sister's friends sing "Happy Birthday, Sister Bear", Sister begins crying.]
Sweetie, what's the matter? It's your birthday! Why are you so upset?
[in between tears] It isn't fair! I was the first one out in musical chairs, I didn't get my donkey game prize, I got bounced on the ponies, and sick in the merry-go-round. And I don't want to have six cubs, I only want to have three!
[Sister resumes crying.]
Gee, Sis. How about your presents? You haven't opened them yet.
And cake and ice cream. You haven't had them yet, either.
I want to thank you for my birthday party, Papa. You and Mama.
Parties are exciting, sweetie, and presents are lovely! But your Mama is right. Getting to be six years old is pretty important. And you're going to be six for a whole year, and it's up to you to make the most of it. To learn, to have fun, to grow in every way.
Hey, terrific! A secret clubhouse! Hot diggety! A new clubhouse! A new clubhouse!
[Sister tries to do her victory dance, but she stops when she hears a drawbridge noise. Brother and the other boys reveal a sign --attached to the underside of the clubhouse door-- which says, "NO GIRLS ALLOWED!".)
No girls allowed?!
[to Sister] THAT'S RIGHT! NO GIRLS ALLOWED!
IT IS NOT FAIR! IT IS NOT FAIR! IT JUST ISN'T FAIR!
[Sister runs off crying. The scene cuts back to the treehouse. In the next scene, Sister is seen with Mama and Papa. She has presumably reported to them about the boys/big cubs not letting her into their boy's clubhouse.]
YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT! IT ISN'T FAIR! IN FACT, IT IS FAIR TO HAVE A COMPLETE AND TOTAL OUTRAGE!
[True to what Papa says, the boys not letting girls allowed is not fair for Sister and he --Papa-- agrees with that. That is, and it is fair that he --Papa-- should have a complete and total outrage. After Papa says, this he says...!]
[calmly, but sternly] NOW COME! WE ARE GOING TO GO BACK THERE AND MAKE THEM --THE BOYS/BIG CUBS-- TAKE YOU INTO THEIR SILLY CLUB! AND IF THEY DON'T, I AM GOING TO DESTROY THAT CLUBHOUSE LIMB FROM LIMB!
Right!
I don't think that's the answer. Those boys are being unfair. Sometimes boys act that way, so do girls, but whoever does it, it's wrong. The important thing is not whether you're a boy or girl, but the sort of person you are. Be that as it may, you can't make cubs play with you.
No, but you can tear them limb from limb! [to Papa] Come on, Papa!
Wouldn't it be a better idea for you to form your own club and build a secret clubhouse of your own?
Could I?
Why not? I'd be glad to help. Why, we can build it in the old climbing tree!
Terrific! The first thing we'll need is a big sign that says: "No Boys Allowed".
No, the first thing you'll need is members.
Those boys were just being mean because I outhit them and won all their marbles! They're bad losers!
I suppose that's true, but you know, there's such a thing as a bad winner, too.
Bad winner? What's that?
A bad winner is somebody who makes a big braggy show every time she wins.
[Sister Bear briefly imagines herself doing her victory dance whilst happily shouting "I won!" repeatedly, which is shown through a thought bubble.]
I see what you mean.
But I think we can work something out.
I'm gonna send it up and follow it in the car. You wanna come along?
Wow! Can I?
[Stops him] DON'T YOU DARE!
[The stranger drives away.]
[sing-songy] ♪BROTHER TALKED TO A STRANGER! BROTHER TALKED TO A STRANGER!♪
[Sister runs back to the house and tells Mama and Papa that Brother talked to a stranger. The scene cuts to Brother who is having a talking-to with Papa.]
But it was a big, orange-and-green radio-controlled job!
That doesn't matter! We have rules about strangers, and they're important!
We have rules about tattletales, too!
Sister wasn't tattling. Tattling is telling just to be mean. Sister was telling because she loves you and she was worried.
Do you think that guy was a bad apple?
Probably not.
That's right, but you have to be careful, just in case.
What are you going to take out at the library today?
Same thing I took out last time.
Help! Screamed the three friends. Help!
STOP! STOP! STOP READING! STOP! STOP! I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT ANYMORE!
Sister is a scaredy bear! Sister is a scaredy...!
Now, now! That will be enough of that! [To Sister] Now sweetie, you mustn't let your imagination run away with you like that. It's only a book.
[Agrees with Papa] Yeah. It's only a book.
A STUPID DOPEY SCARY BOOK!
I heard it! It went... [cowardly moaning like a ghost] ...ooooohhh, oooooohhhh, oooohhh!
Do you know anything about this, young fella?
It's like Papa said. She just let her imagination run away with her.
Uh-huh. [puts Sister Bear back in the top bed] Well, let's just put it this way. [angrily looking down at Brother] If there's anymore "ooh ooh ooh", it's going to be followed by a little "ow, ow, ow!"
Alright. Let's settle down and get some sleep. Papa and I are going to bed now so we'll be right by and we'll leave the lights on for the time being
Thank you Mama.
[Angry] Leave the lights on?! What about me? I can't sleep with the lights on! They keep me awake!
Well that's just too bad. [Brother angrily gets out of bed and turns the lights off.] HELP!!! CAVE MONSTERS!!! MAMA!!! PAPA!!! COME QUICK!!!
[During the night, Sister's fear of the dark causes disruption as the cubs' bedroom light keeps getting switched on and off...]
Help!
[The lights go on]
Can't sleep.
[The lights go off]
Help!
[The lights go on again]
Can't sleep.
[The lights go off again]
Help!
[The lights go on yet again]
Can't sleep!
[The lights go off yet again]
Help!
[The lights go on]
Can't sleep...
Good morning, Mrs. Bear. There's some mail for you.
Thank you, Mr. Mailbear. Oh, good. My "Treehouse Keeping" magazine.
Hi, Mama, excuse us. Hey, how about a game of tiddlywinks?
Okay. I'll race you up to our room.
You're on!
Those cubs! With that kind of energy, you'd think they could take better care of their room. Ahh... speaking of rooms, aren't these lovely?
[Regarding with the new changes to the closet.]
I do not think I dare.
Go ahead! Open it!
[When Mama opens the closet, she sees all the boxes with the cubs's favorite things. And they are marked down with a specific category they belong to. For example, Brother's dinosaur collection belongs in the box of dinosaur models. That is, which is the box that has the word "DINOSAURS" marked on it.]
Oh! Yes, indeed! A room and a closet to be proud of!
What about us?
Yeah, aren't you proud of us, too?
Abso-tively pos-olutley!
Hey, what about yours truly, Papa Q. Bear?
What do you think, cubs? Should we keep ol' Papa Q.?
[Laughing]: Yeah, let's keep him!
[Brother and Sister Bear started with name-calling]
HEY! COME ON, SILLYHEAD! DIDN'T YOU HEAR MAMA!?
I HEARD HER! STOP BEING SUCH A FUZZ BRAIN!
YOU NOODLEPUSS!
LAY OFF, YOU LITTLE MINI!
Now, see here!
[In the dining room, Brother and Sister are tugging over one honey jar]
Gimme that!
I had it...first!
Stop grabbing!
[enters the dining room and sees Brother and Sister fighting over a honey jar] For goodness sake! Where are your manners?! There's plenty of honey for everyone.
I'm calling it "The Bear Family Politeness Plan". It seems to me that the best way to fight bad habits is with good habits. For example, if any of us forgets to say "please and thank you", he or she has to sweep the front steps. And pushing or shoving means you have to beat two rugs.
[Echoing from the book, if you forgot a "please" or "thank you" you had to sweep the front steps, if you pushed or shoved you had to beat two rugs, and if you got caught name calling you had to clean the entire cellar. In the book, it says, "If you forgot a 'please' or 'thank you' you had to sweep the front steps, if you pushed or shoved you had to beat two rugs, if you were caught interrupting you had to dust the downstairs, and if you were caught name calling you had to clean the entire cellar".]
But Mama, all those chores?
YOU'RE NOT BEING FAIR!
It seems to me that you're the ones that aren't being fair. Manners help us to get along with each other. Why, without manners...
[interrupts] Your mama's absolutely right!
Thanks for your comment, Papa, but interrupting is number 3 on the rude list. And the penalty is dusting the room.
But...
You didn't say, "thank you" for the duster. I'm afraid that means after you're finished dusting, you have to sweep the front steps (and that's number 1). [leaves the living room]
[Papa starts dusting the table with a feather duster]
[reading the chart] Rude noises, what does that mean?
Oh you know, [blows raspberry]
Penalty number 7!
[names the penalty for the 7th rule; as shown on the "Bear Family Politeness Plan" rule list] Weed the garden!?
[Later, Papa dusts the downstairs, sweeps the front steps, pull the weeds from the garden. This was penalties 3, 1, and 7. He was caught interrupting, forgot a "Please" and a "Thank You", and made rude noises. And indeed, when starting the "Bear Family Politeness Plan", forgetting a "Please" or a "Thank You" meant you had to sweep the front steps, pushing or shoving was beat two rugs, interrupting was sweep the front steps, and name calling was cleaning the entire cellar.]
This is serious. If we're not careful, we may end up doing all those chores.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Berenstain Bears pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.