Totally!
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
TTina
Hi, and welcome back to "So You Wanna Win $5?"
TSTony's assistant
Tony! It's the Al Dente Brothers!
OMr. Oldman
Hello?
PCPrank caller
Hello?
OMr. Oldman
Hello?
PCPrank caller
Hello?
OMr. Oldman
Hello?
PCPrank caller
Hello?
OMr. Oldman
Hello?
PCPrank caller
Goodbye!
OMr. Oldman
That was so pointless!
...home and take a shower.
...home and rearrange my dog!
...sniff a peanut.
...stir-fry a bikini.
...dissect a puppet.
...sweep an elephant.
...get my grandmother out of jail.
...take these girls out to dinner. You want to say it?
...drain my sinuses.
...digest an elephant.
...apprehend this criminal!
...reupholster my father!
...alphabetise my sisters!
...massage a doughnut!
...yank my molars!
...overthrow Canada!
...scuba-dive with a wiener dog!
...body slam my grandmother!
...hypnotise a social worker!
...teach this guy how to do brain surgery!
...take a cruise to Hawaii!
...butter my elbows.
...swallow some awful clams.
...give my parents their allowance.
...rotate my tyres.
...travel intergalacticly.
...feed my monkeys!
...on a date with LFO and Dancing Lobsters!
...get home before my parents do!
...burp this baby.
...digest a coconut.
[Josh is playing rock, paper, scissors against himself in the mirror when Penelope shows up.]
Where's Amanda?! [Josh screams.] I said, "Where's Amanda, please?"
JJosh
I...I don't know.
How very sad for you.
[She holds up a tuning fork with electricity inside it.]
JJosh
No! Oh, please don't damage me! I'm just starting puberty! It's going to be a whole new world!
Wait!
JJosh
What?!
You're an actor on The Amanda Show!
JJosh
Yeah.
Perhaps you can be useful to me.
JJosh
How?
Introduce me to Amanda!
JJosh
You're crazy! I'll get fired!
I'll make it worth your while.
JJosh
Huh?
You know, you scratch my back, I scratch yours.
JJosh
Uh, okay. [He turns around.] Right between the shoulders.
No, brainless! [Slaps him on the butt.] I'm offering you a deal!
JJosh
What kind of a deal?
[Penelope grabs Josh's hair to make him stand up, and he reacts to it.]
You introduce me to Amanda, and I will make your co-actor, Blake, disappear.
JJosh
Drake? Why would I want Drake to disappear?
Think about it, simple boy. With Blake gone, you'll get to play all of his parts on the show.
JJosh
Wow.
[Josh imagines himself in a Hillbilly Moment sketch, Tony Pajamas sketch, and Totally Kyle sketch, in the roles where Drake normally appears; the first two sketches air later in the episode.]
Well?
JJosh
How do we get rid of Blake?
BBarney
Am I in...China?
Remember our deal; I dispose of Blake.
JJosh
Drake.
It matters!
JJosh
Sorry.
I get rid of Blake, and you introduce me to Amanda.
AAnnouncer
This is the courtroom of Judge Trudy. When you have a beef, don't take the beef into your own hands. Put your beef in the hands of Judge Trudy. Okay.
My name's Amanda, and....
Well, that's our show. I gotta go.... See ya!
Please.
Where's Amanda?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Amanda Show pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.