Whoa hey, Miley Cyrus, settle.
Eat me, Hasselhoff.
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
I used to pray to you Castiel, every night. I would beg you to bring him home safe.
I know.
I didn't even have a father!
Of course you had a father. You were just conceived during a winter solstice orgy, and it's not like I was taking names.
We know John Winchester isn't going to win any #1 Dad awards, but damn if he wasn't there when we needed him.
Hey, uh, tell him about that time in New York.
Oh Yeah... Yeah, okay so, ah. We were working this haunting in Long Island, and me and Sam begged the old man to let us go to the city, for once.
He had this thing about New York; too big, too loud, too dirty.
And he hated the Yankees.
Big time, yeah.
Somehow we convinced him to let us go. So we all go, we all you know see the sites and ride the subway, eat too much pizza, the whole nine. By about midnight Sam and Dad are zonked, and I figure 'screw it, I'm going to CBGB.'
CBGB is...
I know. It's where the Ramones and Blondie got their start.
Right, wow. Anyway he was way underage at the time.
So I get there, I sneak in, and it is nuts. I mean people are drinking, and they're smoking, and they're snorting whatever. There's a 500 pound guy on the stage with mohawk just screaming. My mind is blown I don't even know what to do. Then this girl walks up, and she's 'Hey why don't come over sit down with me and my friends at this table,' 'yeah, alright.'
Yeah and they get him drunk. First time.
But not fun drunk, I'm not quite sure what was in that stuff, but the room starts to spin, and I feel like I'm going to puke forever. Right about that time, I hear him. 'Dean Winchester.' My old man, I don't know how but he found me. And now I'm really freaking out, because he's just standing there not saying anything, and I look around everyone else is freaking out too in fact no one is looking him in the eye, then finally this one guy with like a safety pin in his nose and a 'kill everything' tattoo looks up and he says 'sorry sir.' Yeah, 'sorry sir' heh. John frickin' Winchester.
He saved you.
Yeah and you know what he got for that? Me whining about how much he embarrassed me. Me telling him that I hated him. But then he stopped and turned around looked at me and said, 'Son, you don't like me that's fine. It's not my job to be liked.'
'It's my job to raise you right.'
And he did.
Do you think Claire is in trouble?
She's hanging out with a guy named Randy, she's in trouble.
That was a massacre, is what it was. There was a time I was a hunter, not a stone cold killer. You can say it, you're not wrong. I crossed a line. Guys this things got to go.
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on there badass. Lighten up. Why do you just assume I won't help?
Because you're a dickwad.
But I'm your dickwad. I have a special place in my... non-heart for you both, to which end ta-da! I would be tickled to help you pop this Biblical zit. To do it you are going to need one specific thing... Your old bud, the First Blade.
What?
As I said ain't life a bitch?
You, Moose, you’re the sane one. You on board with this?!
You want me to procure the most dangerous weapon on the planet for Dean Winchester, the man who goes mental every time he touches it? I thought you wanted to go for a beer, catch a film.
Okay look, the Blade may be powered down, but the Mark is not. I'm doing everything I can to keep it together. Now you think the body count around me is high right now? Wait till Hal takes over.
The first blade is back in play and Crowley is the one getting it? I don’t mean to be an alarmist but...
Yeah well you know us, when we screw ourselves, we like to go whole hog.
This would be the Crowley who let the blade turn Dean into a demon?
I don't have a choice, okay. I don't do this I'm down the rabbit hole; hear evil, see evil, do evil - the trifecta.
We have the first blade
Not here? Not on your person?
Not saying, so back to you what’s next?
This is where it gets kinda interesting.
Aha.
It’s very lonely here, and I have very little to do but think, and it occurred to me that you really need this mark taken off of you, and in order to do that you really need me. So here’s the deal, that first little tip I gave you, a freebie, just ‘cause you’re you. Every future step, they’re gonna cost you, big, oh and FYI there’s a bunch.
[Dean locks the rooms’ door]
What you doing there slugger?
I’m settling a score that’s taken way too long to settle. Oh and while I do that I’m gonna get some information, and I’m gonna enjoy every minute of it. [He picks up an angel blade] Because you’re going to tell me everything, all of it, and it ain’t gonna cost me a damn dime... slugger.
My morality is being judged by Dean Winchester? How many people have suffered and died because they believed in you? How many times have you lied to Sam, including, oh by the way, when he was possessed by an angel? And you say, 'oh well it's all for the greater good' but lately buddy, that greater good thing went away didn't it? Now people die because you want them to. [Dean punches Metatron] Good Dean, go darker. [Dean punches Metatron] Go deeper. [Dean punches Metatron repeatedly] Surely you noticed every time you respond, when the Mark gets you all twitchy, you fall deeper under its spell. You think roughing up a few demons or humans makes it worse? Try messing with the Scribe of God, bucko!
And then Kevin's death all on you, you put him in harms way and kept him there. Gadreel possessing Sam, who was it who tricked Sam into letting him in? And then my personal favorite - Dean Winchester. Whose entire existence is defined by a war on the dark and monstrous, bromancing his way around the country with the King of Hell!
[Dean punches Metatron]
Let’s try this again. What is, the next step?!
What is it you humans say so inelegantly? Oh yes, ‘go screw yourself’
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Supernatural pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.