Mr. Garrison, Canadian Kid #1 and others in “Where My Country Gone?”

Okay children, let's take our seats. As you've probably noticed, our government has decided to let anyone who wants to cross the border and screw up our country! I know you're all as pissed off as I am, so why don't we begin today's lesson on why the once-great empire of Rome, fell to shit! Huh?! Who can tell my why Rome fell to shit?! [all the Canadian kids raise their hands] No, somebody who matters. [the Canadian students begin to clamor; puts his left hand over his nose and closes his eyes] Alright, fine, (you) in the orange shirt.

The Roman Empire, buddy, was facing ehh several issues, guy, and they reached a new millennium, friend, and rather-

[irritated] Oh, speak in English! [turns around and begins writing on the chalkboard] You see, what happened is that these immigrants called the Goths were welcomed into Roman territories because some people felt bad for them. [another Canadian boy checks his watch and hops off his seat, opens a small case and pulls out a trumpet] And then the Goths suddenly decided they were being oppressed, you see, and so then- [the boy begins to play "Feels So Good" by Chuck Mangione; turns around] What the hell are you doing? [the other Canadian kids get out of their seats and whip out their trumpets to play the song]

It's 8:00 A.M., guy.

[loses his temper, then throws his notes, and the chalk] That's it! Why don't you canucks go back where you came from?! [they stop and look aghast at him]