(Cut to the Queef Sisters' bedroom. Philip is dodging various missiles being thrown at him by Katherine.)
You stupid bitch, what the fuck is wrong with you? (He ducks to avoid a vase as it smashes against the wall.)
I'm not your sex toy, you fucking pig! (She chucks another vase at Philip, who dodges that one as well.)
You don't queef in bed while we're having sex!
Fuck you, you don't fucking slap me! (The lights come on to reveal Terrance and Katie in the other bed.)
Can you please keep it down? We're trying to have sex over here!
She queefed while we were having sex, Terrance!
Terrance (thoroughly repulsed): SICK!!
Katie (gamely): Well, what's the big deal?. I've been queefing in this bed the entire time! (Terrance does a double-take.)
WHAT?!!! GROSS!!! (He slaps Katie.)
How dare you!!! (She punches Terrance right in the face. Both women start pushing them to the door.)
Katherine (screeching hysterically): GET OUT! GET OUT, BOTH OF YOU!!! WE NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN!!! (They shove Terrance and Philip through the threshold and onto the porch.)'
Terrance (dumbfounded): After all we've been through? (He gets his answer from the door suddenly slammed in their face. The two sisters hug each other, crying and queefing in equal measure.)
(Cut to the porch. Terrance and Philip are smoking cigarettes and bemoaning their position.)
Terrance (sighing): What the hell am I going to do, Philip? She makes me so mad sometimes!
Katherine just won't stop queefing...but I don't know if could live without her...
(Cut back to the bedroom. The Queef Sisters are still crying and queefing, when Terrance and Philip come back in.)
Philip (contrite): Katie, I'm sorry. I was wrong.
Terrance (equally contrite): Me too, Katherine. I don't love your queefs, but dammit, I love you.
Katherine (runs to hug Terrance): Oh, Terrance...
Katie (doing the same with Philip): Philip! (Both couples get back in their respective beds and start getting their Canadian freak on, and soon the room is a cacophony of farts and queefs.)
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