Sledge Hammer quotes from Sledge Hammer!

Sledge Hammer

Hey, get back here! Don't you wanna finish the job? You lazy Commie! (after chasing off a foreign spy/assassin)

Sledge

You know, that's what I hate about newspapers in this country. They find out things, and then they write about them!

Hammer

This is a precinct, not an encounter group. If a man and a woman have problems, they should settle them the way my wife and I did, with a divorce.

Hammer

Doreau, what are you doing? Cops can't go around making promises they can't keep. That right is reserved for the President

Hammer

That was reckless, it was careless, it was totally irresponsible. And I loved it.

Hammer

This whole thing has just complete sapped my self-confidence. I'm not a man any more. I'm indecisive. Well, actually, I don't know, maybe I'm not. No, I, I... am.

Hammer

If they resist arrest.

Trunk

Hammer, you don't seem to understand my dilemma. I've been fighting with the city hall for over two months now. They're talking about making cutbacks. The mayor is threatening this entire department. Do you understand what I am saying?

Hammer

You want me to kill the mayor.

Trunk

Hammer, this is Trunk. Have they hurt anyone?

Hammer

No.

Trunk

Have you hurt anyone?

Hammer

Not yet.

I'll get a bullhorn and try to talk him down.

Hammer

No, no, I can handle this.

Hammer! [Hammer opens fire at the man, but missing and shooting off pieces of the ledge. The suicide jumper finally takes cover inside the building]

Hammer

Another life saved and I still have one bullet left. Listen my bank is just around the corner, can we stop and I'll get some cash and then you can buy me breakfast.

Of all the officers I've recruited, there's something strangely appealing about you. I guess it's your callous disregard for human rights, your savage instinct, your chauvinism, your inability to treat women as equals.

Hammer

Yeah, I'm quite a catch.

Trunk

Hammer, have you no compassion for what those people are going through?

Hammer

Of course I do. I have suffered a sense of loss just like everyone else. I lost my luggage once. I was torn up about it for weeks.

Hammer

You know, Captain, I never thought I'd go out like this. I always thought I'd live to see a nuclear war.

Trunk

You've got forty-six minutes left. It could still happen.

Hammer

Thanks, Captain.

Hammer, there's a report of gunfire in an apartment building a couple of blocks from here.

Hammer

Who needs coffee? That'll get me revved up!

Mr. Slag, I want to know if Inspector Hammer has mistreated you in any way.

What are these? Are these shackles really necessary?

Sledge Hammer

I'm just trying to make his stay in Hotel Hammer a little more uncomfortable.

Remove these shackles.

Sledge Hammer

You don't want me to remove them.

Inspector Hammer!

There. Does that feel better, Slag?

Sledge Hammer

Just, uh, tell me if you want me to help you. You know, just say, "help me, Hammer" and I'll...

[manages to croak] Help.

Sledge Hammer

All right, heel, ratboy.