So you the new slumlord?
New owner, yeah.
Nessa Chabon. 2C.
Hi. Fiona Gallagher.
If you're here to meet the gas company, he's been and gone.
Shit.
Nah. I let him in. He checked the meter and split.
Thanks.
You're welcome. I do a lot of things around the building. Lightbulbs, clogged toilets, leaky faucets, stuff like that. The previous owner didn't do shit.
Are you a... handyman?
Handy, but not a man. Nah, I'm an accountant. United Airlines. What about you? Where are you from? Humboldt Park? Bucktown? Making a small real estate play to jazz up your 401k?
Hardly. I'm South Side, through and through. You?
Immigrant from distant shores... Oak Brook.
That's nice. What brings you down here to live among the great unwashed?
I'm a pilgrim escaping gender persecution. Local country club ladies weren't too pleased with my choice of dance partners. So have you met any of the other tenants yet?
No.
Well, the old lady with cancer and cats has been living in 1C since the South seceded from the Union. Vet with PTSD in 2D always has really good weed. And the junkie couple in 1D fight a lot and occasionally set shit on fire. And the woman with the couple dozen kids from a couple dozen different dads in 1A. The kids are a terror.
Think it's too late to ask the bank for my deposit back?
So are you gonna move in here yourself or rent this one out?
Gonna rent it.
How much?
Not sure. Area's up and comin'.
Urban homesteaders and all that.
Yeah. Lincoln Square lumberjacks are definitely migrating south.
I'm not... I'm not gay.
Cool, I'm not looking. And you're not my type anyway.
What's your type?
Blonde and bitchy. I'm a masochist... Not physical pain, but emotional turmoil is my thing.
More from this episode
All quotes from this episode →More Shameless quotes · These quotes come from Wikiquote's Shameless pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.