Sesame Street quotes

Oh, hi Dana!

Hello.

Nice day, isn't it?

Yeah, very nice. Bebe?

Hmmm?

Why are you walking like that?

What?

That.

Oh.

Gordon

With your head between your legs.

Oh, because.

Gordon

Because why?

Just because.

Gordon

You're walking with your head between your legs, just because? Uh, can't you give me a better reason than just because?

Well, I guess I could try, but I don't think I could come up with a better reason.

Gordon

Yeah, I understand.

You know what I'm gonna do now?

Gordon

What?

This. (makes a weird move) De-do. De-do. De-do. De-do. De-do. De-do. De-do.

Look, look, I'm tellin' you, she's a great candidate! She says that she's against big spending, big business, and inflation. She says when she gets into office, there'll be enough money for government, social programs, and the space program.

Bob

Hey, sounds great. What's her name?

Gordon

Alice in Wonderland.

Ernie what's the matter?

(cries) Bert it's terrible Bert!

What's terrible Ernie?

I wanted to go out and play baseball today, but look outside; it's raining outside! (cries)

Oh that's it huh? Ernie it's not so bad.

Not so bad Bert?! (tugs at Bert’s shirt)

Hey, hey…

Yes it is Bert. It's very bad. (cries)

Oh, hey I have an idea Ernie. Why don't you just imagine you're out playing baseball?

Imagine? (Smiles in ideal)

Yes. Imagination can be as good as the real thing Ernie.

(happily) Okay Bert. I'll try it.

Okay good. (Walks off)

Okay (begins to imagine; the rain noticeably stops) The fans are cheering. (Fans cheering are heard) The umpire shouts..."(Umpire: Play ball!!!)" And I step up to the plate and the pitcher throws ball. I take a swing. (swings baseball bat) Oh it's a perfect hit. The ball goes high above the roof, in the sky and into the clouds. Then it begins to fall. Down down down down down it falls, into...(a splash is heard) In the ocean. Oh no.

Ernie it stopped raining. You can go out and play baseball.

No I can't Bert.

Why not?

The baseball is at the bottom of the ocean Bert. (Bert stares at Ernie in confusion)

(After he has to have only one cherry since Ernie ate all of the other ones) Aw-oh-ho-a-wa…

What’s the matter, Bert? Don’t you want your cherries?

AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (faints)

I guess he’s not hungry. (eats the rest of the cherries)

Gordon Robinson

Sally, you've never seen a street like Sesame Street. Everything happens here. You're gonna love it!

Good evening, and welcome to Monsterpiece Theater.

It's not easy being green.

Rubber Ducky, you're the one.

The statue knows "Rubber Ducky", Bert.

Me do anything for cookie!

It is I, your furry pal, Grover!

Ah, what a beautiful day! I really should come here more often. It's much nicer to have lunch here in the park where there aren't any waiters! [Grover suddenly comes in, playing a guitar.] Oh no...

Ha-ha, yes, it is I, Grover!

The very waiter I was hoping to get away from!

Uh, excuse me sir, but I am not a waiter.

Well of course you are; you waited on me hundreds of times!

No, but today is my day off, and on my day off, I am a writer and singer of songs!

Of all the benches in all the parks in the world, I had to pick this one!

I looooove making music! And I looooove singing! La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la! And I looooove to find words that sound the same, words that rhyme! Sir, would you care to make a request?

I certainly would.

Oh good!

Go away! And let me have my lunch.

Hmm. Well, that is two requests actually, but I will be glad to oblige. [starts playing and singing]

THAT'S ENOUGH!!

Oh! Well you are right; that is enough of "Go Away!" And now, a little tune I like to call, "Let Me Have My Lunch!" [starts playing again]

Ugh...

This is the vamp, I love this part! You can tap your foot if you like.

Yes yes yes, that's just swell!

Swell indeed! In fact, all the rhyming has made me quite hungry for my lunch.

Ugh, take mine!

Oh, that is very kind of you, sir. But what about your lunch?

Well, I was thinking of that restaurant where you work!

Oh, but sir, I will not be there!

Ah, exactly! [walks off]

Wait, sir! I shall play for you while you eat! [gives chase]

What if a dog was blue, and had feathers, and two skinny legs, and wings, and a long, feathery tail, and a beak, and tiny, tiny ears? What would he be?

What if a mouse were as big as an elephant, and the elephant had the mouse's ears, and the mouse had the elephant's ears, and the elephant had the mouse's whiskers, and the mouse had the elephant's head, and the elephant's tusks, and the elephant had the mouse's body, and the mouse had the elephant's body, and they both switched tails, and the elephant was as small as a mouse? What do you think would happen?

What if a frog had a fly's wings, and a fly's eyes, and a fly's head, and a fly's hairy body, and a fly's legs? Now then, what if the fly had frog's legs, and a frog's head, and last, but not least, a frog's body? What do you think would happen?