Kyle Valenti quotes from Roswell

Kyle

Yeah. I just... I'm just not looking forward to dealing with all the little green men again.

Kyle

What do you suppose alien crystals are going for on eBay?

Kyle

Isabel, I'm all for denial as a... way of life, but you can't just run away from this one.

Kyle

Nothing's ever simple with you people, is it?

Kyle

Michael, Michael, Michael. Let me explain something to you. Here on the planet earth we have this thing called jealousy.

Kyle

Look, it's been a long time, all right? I used to be a fun guy. I used to have fun, but then the alien invasion happened, and I sorta- my social life started to suck.

Kyle

But what I was going to say was maybe Michael can get like "I'm eternally sorry" tattooed there instead and just flash it every half hour, regardless. Saves time, cuts stress.

Kyle

What's the best thing that's ever happened to you?

Max

Getting adopted, I guess.

Kyle

I'm gonna shed a tear.

Kyle

Hey! This is my room & that's my jersey!

Kyle

No. Alright. Wear it.

Tess

kinda uptight about nudity for a guy who reads jugs.

Kyle

gimme that!

Tess

oh the post-its? Nice touch.

Kyle

Ok, listen. I don't know how they do things on Planet Vulcan, or whatever. But here on Earth we have this primitive human concept called, privacy.

Tess

Keep talking to me like that & I'll slag you with my death ray eyes.

Kyle

*stares*

Tess

Kidding. You Buddhists have like no sense of humor.

Kyle

How do you know about that?

Tess

Buddhism for Beginners is also under your bed. How do you think the Buddha would feel about being sandwiched between Hustler & Busty Biker Babes?

Kyle

Look, you can't tell anyone about that.

Tess

why?

Kyle

because I have a certain reputation.

Tess

which the less said the better?

Kyle

I'm serious

Tess

Kyle Valenti, Buddhist.

Kyle

look, I got into it over the summer

Tess

Oh! Football camp! Guys are crazy about-

Kyle

Listen! This... this whole aliens-are-among-us thing... it really screwed me up... made me question stuff... life, reality, my place in this universe... and you don't understand. You... you guys... you people turned my life upside down. I need a little clarity. I need a little peace of mind.

Tess

No, I don't understand. I'm a girl from another planet. No family, no friends. Only 3 other people like me in the world. And the man I grew up with...the man who raised me...he was just murdered. You're right, Kyle. What would I know about needing peace of mind?

Maria

So how does electricity work?

Kyle

Why are you lookin' at me? We were both in the same remedial science class for 3 years.

Kyle

Look we're getting off the point. I really need some help.

Tess

what do you want from me? I don't know what's gonna happen to you. Maybe nothing will. Or maybe you could develop super powers & start flying around Roswell in a big cape. *laughs* I don't know!

Kyle

So what's the deal with this guy?

Michael

Son of a bitch killed us.

Max

All of us.

Kyle

He killed you?

Liz

No, he risks so much when he healed me. It's what made me fall in love with him.

Kyle

Yeah, me, too.

Liz

Kyle!

Kyle

Well, maybe. But I realize that I'm part of something bigger than myself.

No, it's not bigger, it's all-consuming. There's a difference. They've robbed you of your life.

Kyle

No, actually they gave me one.