It doesn't matter where we sleep just as long as I'm with my wife.
My husband.
My lunch.
S1 E2The Honeymoon's Over Or Now What
Reba [to Brock]: When you knocked up your hygienist, you lost the right to touch my muffins!
S1 E3Someone's At the Gyno With Reba
(Jake is playing with a uterus model at the gynecologist's office)
Jake, put down the uterus, it's not a toy.
(After Cheyenne didn't say anything about how Van decorated the room)
Well, that sucked!
Tell me about it!
(as she opens the fridge, which is full of food) There is like nothing in here!
Do you think Dad would care about what kind of bedspread is on the bed?!
It's obvious that your father doesn't care about what's on his bed!
S1 E4You Make Me Sick
Van [to Cheyenne]: I want you to stop vomiting.
If I can control it I'd do it on you right now.
Coach said B.J. was only sick for one day and do you know why that is?
I don't know, something to do with Jesus?
There's no teenage orgy on our lawn. There's a couple frisky squirrels but I just tell Jake they're dancing.
Mom, singing's lame.
S1 E5The Steaks Are High
Reba (looks at her watch): It's 5:00 AM, somebody better whack me with a mallet.
See...Mrs. H, I'm "Player of the Week."
So I heard...Ungawa
Reba (after agreeing to Van's plea that she host the team's steak dinner): Boy he sure makes it hard to say no.
Cheyenne (smiling suggestively): Tell me about it.
Mom, you hold them down and I'll whack them with the mallet!
It's Marci & Luanne. They're on the drill team.
Mom, you hold them down and I'll whack them with the mallet!
S1 E6The Man and the Moon
Why is your blouse all wet?
I entered a wet blouse contest.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Reba pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.