Psych quotes
0 total quotesLassiter: Spencer, you realize you are the second to last person I want to be speaking to right now.
Season 2
Season 2
Lassiter: There is something I've got to get off my chest.
Shawn: Is it your shirt? Please say no.
Shawn: Is it your shirt? Please say no.
Lassiter: You have a criminal record.
Shawn: I was 18.
Lassiter: Oh, 18? Well that makes it okay, let me just scratch this out.
Shawn: I was 18.
Lassiter: Oh, 18? Well that makes it okay, let me just scratch this out.
Lassiter: You solved all these crimes - what was it - watching the local channel 8 news reports?
Shawn: All right, I confess, that's not true. Sometimes I watch channel 5. I prefer channel 8. The weather girl? Adorable.
Lassiter: So you're telling us that you can read guilt off of TV interviews?
Shawn: Can't you?
Shawn: All right, I confess, that's not true. Sometimes I watch channel 5. I prefer channel 8. The weather girl? Adorable.
Lassiter: So you're telling us that you can read guilt off of TV interviews?
Shawn: Can't you?
Lorraine: This is a speed dating first! [to Shawn and Juliet] You and you are a 100 percent match from your personality questionnaires. I smell love!
Juliet: I need a drink.
Shawn: I gotta pee.
Juliet: I need a drink.
Shawn: I gotta pee.
Receptionist: There is a Lt. Crunch here to see you.
Gus: Crunch?
[Shawn enters dressed in Civil War uniform]
Shawn: Actually I've been promoted. It's Captain Crunch.
Gus: Crunch?
[Shawn enters dressed in Civil War uniform]
Shawn: Actually I've been promoted. It's Captain Crunch.
Sally: [Gus is wearing his Civil War uniform and plume] I think you look dashing. Personally I always loved the marching band.
Shawn: He is very forgiving of others. For instance just the other day, I spilled the hot cocoa all over his genitals, and I say "I'm sorry", and everything is fine.
Shawn: (kissing waitress, grabs phone)
Waitress: What are you doing?
Shawn: I'm calling the police.
Waitress: Any particular reason?
Shawn: I think I just solved a case.
Waitress: You didn't tell me you're a cop...
Shawn: Me? Oh god, no. Wait! Does that disappoint you?
Waitress: No, I just thought you might have handcuffs...
Shawn: (grins) Oh, I have handcuffs.
Waitress: What are you doing?
Shawn: I'm calling the police.
Waitress: Any particular reason?
Shawn: I think I just solved a case.
Waitress: You didn't tell me you're a cop...
Shawn: Me? Oh god, no. Wait! Does that disappoint you?
Waitress: No, I just thought you might have handcuffs...
Shawn: (grins) Oh, I have handcuffs.
Shawn: [in a fake Swedish accent] Maybe it's because all of California is on the diet. Yes? All the surfing boys and the model girls.
Shawn: [to Lassiter] Please tell me you're not one of those courtroom groupies that bounces from trial to trial��wait a second, was that you at the Michael Jackson hearing with the sequined glove and the shirt that said "Please free the man in the mirror"?
Shawn: Actually, we'd like to start with the contestants still in the running. And let's start with the shifty-eyed ones!
Shawn: And by the way, Dad, my birthday wasn't yesterday. It was...four months ago!
Henry: Yeah, well, after you were born it took you four months to smile at me. That's when the clock started tickin'.
Henry: Yeah, well, after you were born it took you four months to smile at me. That's when the clock started tickin'.
Shawn: Banana.
Speller 118: Can you repeat that?
Shawn: Yes. Ba-NA-na.
Gus: [whispering] Banana, Shawn? It's the third round.
Shawn: [whispering] You could have helped me.
Gus: [whispering] This is a dead end, Shawn. We're leaving.
Speller 118: Definition, please.
Shawn: [to himself] What...?
Shawn: [into the microphone] A yellow fruit. Also, a kind of pudding. A delicious pudding.
Speller 118: Sentence, please.
Shawn: Anna Banana would like to hear "Venus" by Bananarama. Banana!
Speller 118: B-A-N-A-N-A. Banana.
Speller 118: Can you repeat that?
Shawn: Yes. Ba-NA-na.
Gus: [whispering] Banana, Shawn? It's the third round.
Shawn: [whispering] You could have helped me.
Gus: [whispering] This is a dead end, Shawn. We're leaving.
Speller 118: Definition, please.
Shawn: [to himself] What...?
Shawn: [into the microphone] A yellow fruit. Also, a kind of pudding. A delicious pudding.
Speller 118: Sentence, please.
Shawn: Anna Banana would like to hear "Venus" by Bananarama. Banana!
Speller 118: B-A-N-A-N-A. Banana.
Shawn: Captain Conners, how are you sir?
Conners: [He has memory problems] Look at you fellas, all grown up. How long's it been?
Shawn: About a day.
Gus: Less, actually.
Conners: [He has memory problems] Look at you fellas, all grown up. How long's it been?
Shawn: About a day.
Gus: Less, actually.