Jesse Custer quotes from Preacher

Jesse Custer

Look, I'm just sayin', boring's not the worst thing a person can be, Cassidy.

Cassidy

I think you're wrong. I think boring's the worst.

Cassidy

Just...tell me how it feels.

Jesse Custer

It feels like... there's a big blender in my gut. And inside that blender, there's everything. Love... hate... fire, ice... polonium, ice cream, tarantulas--everything. All of god's creation... inside of me.

Cassidy

But I mean, after that, these two fella come by, right, dressed as cowboy blokes on the outside, but sounded more like two blokes who just stumbled in out of a pub in Clerkenwell, if you know what I'm tryin' to say.

Jesse Custer

I have no idea.

Odin Quincannon

Now, you know the rules. I don't talk how my meat gets made, you don't talk about your magic man in the sky.

Jesse Custer

No shame in having questions.

Odin Quincannon

I'm not ashamed. And I know what comes next. Nothing.

Jesse Custer

Maybe. But what if you're wrong? What if there's Judgement?

Odin Quincannon

"Judgement."

Jesse Custer

What if we're held to account for our actions? What if there's punishment? What if there is fire?

Odin Quincannon

What if there's ice and darkness? What if there's beasts with cloven hooves and tortured children and screams that curdle your blood? What if they tear you apart real slow-like, with chains and spikes? What if it's deeper than that, like some say, and you spend all eternity living your worst memory over and over and over? Or what if you feel nothing? Except for all the pain you caused everybody else? Jeez.

Jesse Custer

Aren't you afraid?

Odin Quincannon

Nope. Seems to me you are, Preacher.

Jesse Custer

So, you're saying this Genesis is some sort of angel/demon baby?

DeBlanc

If by "baby," you mean the most powerful entity ever known, the singular force that could shift the balance of power, threaten all of creation, then, yeah, it's a baby.

Jesse Custer

What about you? You look like a men's room wall.

Cassidy

I went through a period of low self-control.

Jesse Custer

Thank God that's over with.

Emily Woodrow

What do you think?

Jesse Custer

I think they should be more scared. An inferno at your back consuming every man, woman, and child in its path. And you're what? Smiling? They should be terrified. The world's ending. Otherwise, who gives a shit?

Jesse Custer

I'm not giving you my father's church.

Odin Quincannon

Yeah. You know, toward the end there, William Travis wrote a letter, one of them cold nights of his up behind the garrison walls. When I was a boy, I kept a copy folded under my pillow. "I have answered the demand with a cannon shot. I shall never surrender or retreat." "Victory or death." Exactly right. Yeah. I'll be back.

Tulip O'Hare

You son of a bitch. Throw someone out on their ass, just 'cause they don't live up to your uptight, redneck Christian standards. Your daddy would by proud.

Jesse Custer

Don't you talk about him! What do you know about standards? O'Hare? Frozen vegetables? Vanilla hash browns? Gimme a break. What are you even doing here?

Tulip O'Hare

That's a real good question. Dick.

Jesse, much bigger things are coming for you, much bigger things than this here. So you got to be one of the good guys. 'Cause why?

Jesse Custer

'Cause there's way too many of the bad.

Jesse Custer

You dug out of Hell with your hands?

It's not that far.

Jesse Custer

What's it like?

Crowded.

Jesse Custer

And what happened to them?

Fiore

They exploded.

Jesse Custer

Why haven't I?

DeBlanc

We don't know.

Jesse Custer

You see, this is my point. What else don't we know?

Fiore

We don't know.

Jesse Custer

I just don't understand what happened. I told you to serve God, Odin.

Odin Quincannon

I am devoutly.

Jesse Custer

What kind of God wants to tear down a church?

Odin Quincannon

The God of Meat, of course.

Jesse Custer

The God of Meat?

Odin Quincannon

The God of what's tangible what's touchable and true. God of Meat.

Jesse Custer

[Laughing] I see. I see.

Odin Quincannon

You think that's funny?

Jesse Custer

No, no. It's batshit crazy.

Odin Quincannon

You know what's crazy, Preacher? What's completely banana balls insane? Following a God who is silent. That is crazy.

Jesse Custer

That's why we're gonna go out and actually find God.

Cassidy

Oh, like a--like a road trip? With buckets of guns, sex, drugs, and shady characters dressed in bikinis?

Jesse Custer

Yeah. I imagine there'll be a bit of that.

Cassidy

I'm in. Done.

Tulip O'Hare

I'm sorry, we're just gonna, like, drive around, shooting people, getting sated, and looking for God?

Cassidy

Oh, I'm so in!

Jesse Custer

Nothing in all these books?

Books? You call heaven on an angel phone to discover God's gone to roam the earth. What book is that exactly?