I don't know. Whenever I made a mistake before I could always fix it. But this...there's no way to undo it. It's just there. Always. I get a knot in my stomach when I think about it.
I just want to feel like I'm still an okay person. Everyone tells me that I am, but it doesn't mean anything. I just look at them and think, what the hell do you know?
Yeah. My parents too. Every Sunday, my mom and I would have a huge fight over wearing a tie. When I came here, it was like one more thing I have to do, you know? Punishment, great. I don't know. One day, I started to see things differently. I actually started to listen to what the guy was saying. A lot of the stuff I could care less about. But the main stuff, the overall feelings...it's cool. This is the only place where all the bad stuff that I've done...all of the mistakes that I've made, don't matter. [pause] They matter. They just don't change what I'm worth. As a person. Here I'm...loved. No matter what. My parents would never say that to me. Even if they thought it they wouldn't say it. I guess yours can't either, huh?
I just think you've got to hang in there and do the time. I mean, that's the one thing you know is going to change. For every sucky day you live, you don't have to live it again. It's done...you did it. Move on. Maybe the next one won't suck.
No, I know. But it's not you you. You're different. It started when you hooked up with the band...that when you guys were singing, you would cop this attitude. And now it's like you're a completely different person all the time.
Because I might change, Bailey. But that should be a good thing. And if being with you means that I can't change, then there's something wrong with being with you, not something wrong with changing. [walks away]
