Mystery Science Theater 3000 quotes
1930 total quotes[David Warner appears.]
Crow [as David Warner]: [apologetic] In it for the money, folks.
Crow [as David Warner]: [apologetic] In it for the money, folks.
[David's son is watching a Japanese cartoon on TV.]
Mike: Why, here's something else Satan created: Japanimation!
Servo: It's the anime version of Peter Rabbit.
Mike: Why, here's something else Satan created: Japanimation!
Servo: It's the anime version of Peter Rabbit.
[Deathstalker approaches a horse and throws a shaggy blue-gray object over its back.]
Mike: Oh no, he made a saddle out of Grover!
Mike: Oh no, he made a saddle out of Grover!
[Deathstalker gets shot down by a princess after saying something rude to her.]
Crow: Well, it looks like I'm boxing the clown again tonight!
Crow: Well, it looks like I'm boxing the clown again tonight!
[Deathstalker gets up from Khorsa and Marinda's potatoes-only feast inside their rough house.]
Khorsa: You sleep in the barn!
Servo [as Deathstalker]: This isn't the barn?
Khorsa: You sleep in the barn!
Servo [as Deathstalker]: This isn't the barn?
[Deathstalker has a very 80's style haircut]
Mike: Well, they missed on haircuts by roughly twelve hundred years.
Mike: Well, they missed on haircuts by roughly twelve hundred years.
[Deathstalker is stick fighting on a log, with a hint of an accent of some sort.]
Crow: Let's see how long THESE accents last!
Crow: Let's see how long THESE accents last!
[Deathstalker leaves the kingdom, and everyone is cheering.]
Mike [as a member of the crowd]: He's leaving! Our long national nightmare is over!
Mike [as a member of the crowd]: He's leaving! Our long national nightmare is over!
[Deathstalker randomly appears outside the tower window to confront Troxartis.]
Mike: What the-- Uh? Th-- Oh... [as Troxartis] You clever bastard. So the editor's working with you!
Mike: What the-- Uh? Th-- Oh... [as Troxartis] You clever bastard. So the editor's working with you!
[Deathstalker sneaks around Troxartis' castle, encountering few obstacles along the way.]
Mike: This movie is like playing Doom when there's no monsters or opponents.
Mike: This movie is like playing Doom when there's no monsters or opponents.
[Deathstalker's friend who looks like Michael McDonald is comforting him after losing Marinda.]
Servo [as Michael McDonald character]: She came from somewhere back in your long ago.
Mike [as Deathstalker]: Look, just shut up.
Servo [as Michael McDonald character]: She came from somewhere back in your long ago.
Mike [as Deathstalker]: Look, just shut up.
[Deathstalker's friend who looks like Michael McDonald is getting ready to attack.]
Servo [as Michael McDonald character]: We're taking it to the streets!
Servo [as Michael McDonald character]: We're taking it to the streets!
[Derek holds his shipmates at gunpoint to prevent the release of the gargon.]
Spacecraft Captain: When we return to our planet, the High Court may well sentence you to torture!
Joel, Crow, Servo: TORCHAA!!
Spacecraft Captain: When we return to our planet, the High Court may well sentence you to torture!
Joel, Crow, Servo: TORCHAA!!
[Derek, armed with a dead cop's gun, looks for Thor along the street.]
Joel [as Derek/Freddy]: [singing to "On the Street Where You Live"]
Joel [as Derek/Freddy]: [singing to "On the Street Where You Live"]