Mystery Science Theater 3000 quotes

1930 total quotes

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Mike [as Lockhart]: We're goin' camping, and you're gonna watch.
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Mike [as Mother]: Hi, I'm Betty, and I'l be your wife tonight.
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Mike: ...And in the future there will still be a two dollar surcharge for using this service despite the technology having proliferated EVERYWHERE ON THE PLANET!
The Space Children (movie)
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Mike: [annoyed] Why didn't they just call this movie The Creeper?
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Mike: [noticing a theme] So the main causes of accidents are joy, sex, and old age?
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Mike: [singing along to generic '80s synth music]
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Mike: A Producer's Releasing Corporation reminding you, don't fear the creeper.
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Mike: Aw, can't I have just one more justice?
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Mike: Hey, y'know, Ron must've gotten directing tips from Bert I.
Servo: That's why he made Willow.
Crow: Hey, I liked Willow!
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Mike: I've never known more about what isn't going on in a movie.
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Mike: Is Velveeta a member of the National Dairy Council?
Servo: Naw, Velveeta's a splinter group.
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Mike: Is your face odd? Misshapen? Join the Air Force.
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Mike: It's a little big; I just want a hotplate!
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Mike: No students' arms were harmed in the making of this film.
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Mike: So convenient to have a Hostage Inn right near the airport.
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