MacGyver quotes

Jack

Well I didn't come here to be shunned. I wouldn't shun you. Why would you shun me? I hate being shunned.

Jack

Hey, we're not dead yet! MacGyver's going to get us out of here. Aren't you, MacGyver?

(inspecting the barricade) Haven't got a clue.

Jack

Mac, that's not like you.

This door is over a foot thick!

It's not just the old man. The spirit of the wolf is part of my people.

Aw, since when? Perry, you and I have been stealing beads and trinkets out of the graves of your people for three years.

We are in Illacom's world now. He will decide my fate—and yours.

My father was a fool, like you. He followed the trap lines until he died in his tracks out here. That's not going to happen to me. I work for Grant. I drive a Camaro.

Bad trade for your soul.

We can make this a very unpleasant trip for you, Chief.

I'm too old to be afraid.

Yeah, but you're not too old to be history.

[voice-over narration] Maybe I was tired. At least that's what I kept telling myself. I'd been following these two for a week. They'd landed clerk jobs with a government contractor three months ago. A week later, they were stealing top secret documents that kept them in Limos, parties, and very mean company.

There's a fine line in nature that divides the hunter from the hunted. The trick was to turn the situation around. The tools I had available were nature, Karen's coat, and the tranquilizer darts in her backpack. The first thing I had to do was to give them something to shoot at that wasn't me.

Yeah, I wanted to be a ranger.

Karen

You wanted to be a ranger. You wanted to be a pilot. You wanted to go to Africa! And every time I agreed and tried to be part of it? You changed your mind.

Karen

You and I closed the book a long time ago. The only reason you came here is because that close call made your life flash before your eyes, and my picture just happened to come up.

I wouldn't have come at all... if you'd told me about Sam.

Karen

I guess that I just needed to see you again to know it was really over.

MacGyver! Oh that does it! I just want to pack up my things right now and I want to go home.

Penny, whatever is going on around here, it's got nothing to do with ghosts or goblins or the supernatural. There is a purely logical explanation for everything.

Really? Well that would sound a lot more reassuring if you weren't holding a human skull.

You never know where life's gonna take you. This is especially true when you've got a friend like Penny Parker. So, I wasn't too surprised when she called one day and told me she had inherited a mansion.

[in a voice-over narration as he's shown driving along rural highways and half-listening to Penny Parker's joyful excited long-winded chatter about how she'd inherited the old Parker House] There was a long story behind the way Penny came into her inheritance, and she was in no hurry to shorten it. In high-school geometry class, I'd learned that the shortest distance between two points is a straight line, but when telling a story, Penny always takes the scenic route.

Anyway, he told me how Aunt Betty's estate goes to the nearest female relative on her 25th birthday. And today is my 25th birthday, and I'm the closest female relative, and before I know it, I'm an heiress! Isn't that wild?

[voice-over narration] My hometown had grown a whole lot in the years since I'd been back. But comin' home was still like reaching into a grab-bag full of memories, some of them good, some of them not so good. And you could never be sure which memory you were gonna come up with. The decisions we make shape our lives. When I was a kid, I made a bad decision about a gun and my life was never the same. Now I was back, 25 years later, to follow up on a promise. One I had to keep, no matter how much it hurt.