Eric Catchpole quotes from Lovejoy

Eric Catchpole

[Referring to his old girlfriend] That'll put a wrinkle in her knickers.

Lovejoy

Doesn't strike me as the sort of girl who wears them.

We've had some real dingbats in here. You've heard about the stuffed wolf, haven't you?

Eric Catchpole

Stuffed wolf?

A couple of months ago an old geezer brought this stuffed wolf in with him - about four foot high.

Eric Catchpole

The geezer?

No, the wolf. He put it in the corner of his room, and the central heating dried it out so much the skin split open, and guess what there was inside?

Tinker Dill

Little Red Riding Hood?

Eric

What did he do?

Lovejoy

Never mind. He's a double-breasted scumbag!

Tinker Dill

[Observing Eric peering in through the window of a ballet class] You can get arrested for that, you know!

Eric Catchpole

[Turning around and seeing Tink going through pirouettes and other ballet moves] You can get arrested for that and all.