Keitarō quotes from Love Hina

Kaolla

So, what are we gonna do with him?

Naru

Crucify and torture him, cut out his tongue, and send him to Hell!

Keitarō

NOOOOOOOO!

Kitsune

That's worth a month's rent.

Keitarō

Huh?

Kitsune

What, weren't you listening? You cop one feel, I get one month's rent free.

Keitarō

What're you talking about?

Naru

What do you think you're doing, you sleaze?

Kitsune

[Fake sobbing] H-he started grabbing my breasts, going, "You like it here? How about here?"

Keitarō

It's the other way around!

Kaolla

Hey, Keitarō, here for a midnight fling? If it's you, I don't mind.

Keitarō

W-What are you saying?

Kaolla

By the way, do flings taste good?

Naru

Wow!

Keitarō

You got a perfect score!

Naru

You're actually a total genius!

Keitarō

H-how could you fail the entrance exam three times with these scores?

Mutsumi

Well, I'm guessing it's because I'm a klutz and I'm frail, and I'd keep forgetting to write down my name, or I'd faint before reaching the exam hall and be hospitalized.

Kaolla

Come, Brother. Come with me.

Keitarō

W-what's happened to you, Su? You're all grown up again! [Su leans over to kiss Keitarō.] Uh, but the adult Su has that exotic, ethnic charm going.

Mutsumi

This way, I can take a good, long look at your face. When I look at your face, Keitarō, I feel so tranquil, like I know you from a long, long, time ago. That's what made me want to study with you for our entrance exams. Am I causing trouble for you?

Keitarō

N-no.

Mutsumi

I want to go to Tokyo U, together with you.

Naru

Hee hee... I'm sorry, I gotta recognize that these things happen. Okay, it's usually the other way around....

Keitarō

So... why do I have to be smacked for that?

Naru

It's just that... it has already became involuntary....

Keitarō

Ouch... I thought I was gonna die.

Mutsumi

You really don't die easy, eh, Keitarō...?

Hmmm, how thrilling. That reminds me of our past perils....

Haruka

I'd rather not to remember it.

Keitarō

Have you ever been through stuff like these before?

[Laughs] Lots of times!

Keitarō

I want you to come with me, Narusegawa. I don't care if we're going to Todai or Tokyo U... But when we do... I just wanna be with you.

Naru

K... Keitarō... are... are you... proposing me... on... on marriage....?

Keitarō

Yeah....

Keitarō

What are you laughing about?

Naru

You got so serious all of a sudden, I didn't expect for that!

Haruka

You're just like Seta. You know nothing about women's feelings. Naru's not like me, you know; if you want to keep your relationship alive, you gotta do "that."

Keitarō

[Surprised] What? Do "that?" You mean "that?"

What's "that?"

Haruka

[Slaps Keitarō in the face] Don't say it so loud! When I say "that," I do mean "that." You're an adult, you know what it's all about!

What's "that?!"

Keitarō

Oh, yeah! Sure, it's "that!" We're grown-ups after all-- [Sara starts choking him, demanding to know what "that" is.]

Keitarō

When Aunt Haruka told me do do "that," I thought she said I should talk to you neatly....

Naru

Uh, I don't think that's what she meant.

Keitarō

Well, actually, I found it a bit odd, too.... Anyway, what really is "that?"

Naru

Eh... "that"... is "that."

Keitarō

Gaaah! I don't get it! Please be clearer!

Naru

[Starts walking away and blushes.] You idiot! Don't you go and put me to shame! You creep!

Kitsune

Now, now, tell me what afflicts your poor little self... You got a friend here...

Keitarō

Ehh... It's-it's nothing... It's really nothing...

Kitsune

It's Naru, right?

[giggling] I didn't know that cars in Tokyo used to attack people...

Keitarō

[embarrassed] They don't really use to...

Kitsune

Damn, you still are the King of the Unlucky, eh, Keitarō?

Kaolla

[laughing] You're a bad luck magnet!

Keitarō

Hey, stop that!

Naru

Haven't you seen my breasts enough!?

Keitarō

[while flying away] Is that a trick question!?