Desmond David Hume quotes from Lost

Locke

What are you doing?

Desmond

... When did you come here?

Locke

What?

Desmond

The island. When did you come here? How long ago?

Locke

Sixty, sixty-five days-

Desmond

What was the date, what was the date?

Locke

September 22nd. It was September 22nd.

Desmond

I think I crashed your plane.

Desmond

[after Locke destroys the computer] You killed us. You killed us all.

Locke

No. I just saved us all.

Jack Shephard

So, before you ran off, I guess you just forgot to mention that you still have a sailboat. Why'd you come back?

Desmond Hume

[laughing] Do you think I did it on purpose? I was sailing for two and half weeks, bearing due West and making 9 knots. I should have been in Fiji in less than a week. But the first piece of land I saw wasn't Fiji, was it? No. No it was here... this, this island. And you know why? Because this, is it. This is all there is left. This ocean and this place here. We are stuck in a bloody snowglobe! There's no outside world! There's no escape! So, just go away, huh. Let me drink.

Desmond Hume

Are you still pushing it?

Jack Shephard

Yeah, we're still pushing it.

Set of keys; one pocket watch, gold plated; one photograph; one book, Our Mutual Friend. Why didn't you bring that inside?

Desmond Hume

To avoid temptation, brother. I've read everything Mr. Charles Dickens has ever written - every wonderful word. Every book except this one. I'm saving it so it will be the last thing I ever read before I die.

Nice idea, as long as you know when you're going to die. [He stamps "discharged" on some papers] Lance Corporal Desmond David Hume your sentence is hereby complete and you are now and forever dishonorably discharged from the Royal Scotts Regiment of Her Majesty's Armed Forces. Long live the queen. Enjoy your sodding book.

Desmond Hume

Well, if you don't want me to go crazy, next time let me go out.

Well, you want to go out there with the quarantine and the hostiles?

Desmond Hume

I haven't been outside for 2 bloody years! Yes, I want to go! I was in the army for God's sake!

Oh, right, Her Majesty's Army, correct? Tell me, Desmond, why'd you leave that nice old lady's army? Oh, I remember now. You got kicked out because you couldn't follow orders.

Desmond Hume

Why did you leave your army, Kelvin, huh?

[beat] Because men followed my orders. [sarcastically] Ah, but then thank God I joined the DHARMA Initiative. Namaste, thank you, and good luck.

Desmond Hume

Can I ask you a question, brother?

John Locke

Absolutely.

Desmond Hume

Is the reason you're letting that clock there run all the way down to the very last tick—is it because you need to look down the barrel of a gun to find out what you really believe, John?

John Locke

I looked down the barrel of the gun and I believed. I thought it was my destiny to get into this place. And someone died—a kid. Because he was stupid enough to believe that I knew what I was talking about. And the night that he died for nothing, I was sitting right up there, all alone, beating my hand bloody against that stupid door—screaming to the heavens asking what I should do. And then a light went on. I thought it was a sign. But it wasn't a sign. Probably just you going to the bathroom.

Hurley

Bear? Is that you? Who's there?

Desmond

You alone, brother?

Hurley

Uh, yeah.

Hurley

[seeing that Desmond's naked] Whoa! Dude! I'm not alone.

Desmond

Beach camp's right over there. Can you get me some clothes?

Hurley

What happened to yours?

Desmond

I woke up in the jungle like this.

Hurley

So, like, the hatch blew off your underwear?

Desmond

Fine, you want to discuss this in great detail right now? Let's do it.

Hurley

No, no, that's okay. I've got something in here. How do you feel about tie-dye?

You play golf?

Desmond

I'm Scottish. Cheers.

Desmond

You've got a problem with your roof.

Claire

What?

Desmond

Look, maybe you should move down the beach for the night so we can fix it.

Charlie

Whatcha doing brotha?

Desmond

I was just offering to fix this roof here.

Charlie

Roof? It's fine. If there's a problem, I'll fix it. I'm quite handy. I was building a church before Eko . . . exploded.

This is wrong. You don't buy the ring. You have second thoughts; you walk right out that door. So, come on, let's have it.

Desmond

I don't know what you're on about.

You don't buy the ring, Desmond.

Desmond

How do you know my name?

Well, I know your name as well as I know that you that don't ask Penny to marry you. In fact, you break her heart. Well, breaking her heart is, of course, what drives you in a few short years from now to enter that sailing race, to prove her father wrong, which brings you to the island where you spend the next 3 years of your life entering numbers into the computer until you are forced to turn that failsafe key. And if you don't do those things, Desmond David Hume, every single one of us is dead. So give me that sodding ring!

Charles Widmore

[showing Desmond a whiskey bottle] This is a 60 year MacCutcheon, named after Anderson MacCutcheon, esteemed Admiral from the Royal Navy. He retired with more medals than any man before or since -- moved to the highlands to see out his remaining years. Admiral MacCutcheon was a great man, Hume. This was his crowning achievement. [pours some into a glass] This swallow is worth more than you could make in a month. [drinks the whiskey] To share it with you would be a waste, and a disgrace to the great man who made it -- because you, Hume, will never be a great man.

Desmond Hume

Mr. Widmore, I know I'm not -

Charles Widmore

What you're not, is worthy of drinking my whiskey. How could you ever be worthy of my daughter?

Desmond Hume

Oh, my God. You knew that was going to happen, didn't you? [she nods] Then why didn't you stop it? Why didn't you do anything?

Eloise Hawking

Because it wouldn't matter. Had I warned him about the scaffolding tomorrow he'd be hit by a taxi. If I warned him about the taxi, he'd fall in the shower and break his neck. The universe, unfortunately, has a way of course correcting. That man was supposed to die. That was his path just as it's your path to go to the island. You don't do it because you choose to, Desmond. You do it because you're supposed to.

Charlie

So, when's it going to happen?

Desmond

When's what going to happen?

Charlie

Don't play stupid with me, brother.

Desmond

I was drunk. If I said anything...

Charlie

I have a right to know when I'm gonna die.

Desmond

It doesn't work like that.

Sawyer

Hey, Oliver Twist! Where the hell is my stuff?

Charlie

What stuff?

Sawyer

You know good and damn well what stuff. I had books, food, porno, bottle of scotch...

Desmond

Apologies for the scotch, mate.